Turning Page
by Vampgirl79
Summary: *Winner for Best Romance and also 3rd place for Most Promising Twilight Fanfiction* Following her mother's tragic death, Bella moves back to Forks. It's there she reconnects with her father, and forms a bond with the next-door neighbor. Is she the one who can heal his wounded heart; or will he hurt her over his fear of falling in love again? All-Human/OOC Rated M
1. Prologue: Unspoken Words and Fears

**A/N: Hello, *waves* Thanks for deciding to read this new little tale titled Turning Page :) Yes, I named this fic after the beautiful song from the BD Pt.1 soundtrack. Anyhow, I admit I am a bit nervous about this fic, because of a few reasons. Mainly I just worry if you all will enjoy it.. And don't let that scare you, I just feel that way about all my fics and my writing. Anyhow, the idea for this story literally popped in my mind one day while I was just chilling at the house. I told myself to just jot the ideas down and don't write it until I complete my other 3 fics, lol. But, well, I couldn't help myself I just had to start writing :) Okay, I won't take up your time yacking. Hope you enjoy the prologue, and I will chat with you more in a bit. Thanks for reading!**

*****Disclaimer: All things Twilight belong to the great Stephenie Meyer! But, I am very grateful she allows us to create our own unique worlds with her characters :) Thanks Steph!**

*****My beta is the super-wonderful, very pretty, bright and sweet Serenshadow! I can't thank you enough for all of your support for my writing, your friendship and agreeing to beta a third FF for me, haa. Thanks for making this pretty :)**

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**Turning Page**

**Prologue: Unspoken Words and Fears  
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****BPOV****

I never imagined it was possible to be this blissful.

To feel such warmth in my heart.

To feel so alive and irrevocably in love.

I am head over heels for the man I am lying next to.

The setting couldn't be any more perfect and romantic. He and I enveloped in each other's arms, lying on a thick, soft blanket right beside the fireplace. The orange, red, and a hint of blue flames, added a gentle glow to the semi-dark room.

His velvet toned hum inside my ear makes my body tremble in his embrace. As his biceps hold me tighter to him, my heart flutters excitedly.

The entire outside world seems insignificant; because as far as I'm concerned, only he and I exist. His warm lips press underneath my earlobe tenderly and I giggle, then spin around to face him. Immediately his green eyes mesmerize me, as they did the first time I looked into them. His intoxicating, soothing scent engulfs my lungs and causes my head to spin.

No doubt about it, this man will always take my breath away.

Sometimes I feel none of this is even real.

The two of us, together at last.

After everything we went through to get to this beautiful place, it's finally happened. And I couldn't be more grateful. Though deep down, I fear that in the blink of an eye, I will lose him. And the happiness I finally harbored after so long, will crumble.

"I love you." I whisper so quietly I'm uncertain if he had heard.

A small part of me wishes he didn't.

It's still touchy between us when it comes to expressing our feelings. Well, for one of us anyway.

He draws out a lengthy sigh and his breath caresses the top of my head. He rests his chin against it, purposely avoiding eye-contact. He can't handle seeing the disappointed, heart-broken expression on my face that's there every time he responds to my declaration.

I guess this time would be no different. He never says those three words back. And I wonder if he ever will, if he will ever feel the same way as I do for him.

I prepare myself for the line he will feed me. I should be immune to the words by now.

My heart drops and my chest clenches painfully as he murmurs in his gentle, creamy voice, "You don't know what you're saying."

This time I sigh and though it's pointless to argue, I do so anyway. It's sort of this game we play, at least it feels like one.

"Yes, I do. That's just it. I know exactly what I'm saying. I know how I feel. Edward..." I place my hand against his chest and look up at him.

Dammit, I wish he would quit being a coward and look back at me!

"you feel it too. I know you do. I know you love me."

God, I sound so pathetic! What's next? Me begging him to reveal his affections? _If that's what it takes._ I just long to hear him say the words, even if only once. I'm desperate to hear them.

"Bella, you know how I feel. I wouldn't...we wouldn't be here, together, if I didn't feel anything for you." His soft lips kiss my forehead and I sigh, nearly melting in his embrace.

He does this on purpose, showers me with physical affections to make up for his lack of verbal ones.

As if that will make it all better.

His beautiful face is inches away from mine and his strong hands are cradling my cheeks. He strokes my skin affectionately and I lean into his touch.

No, no! Not this time! Goddamn him for always getting underneath my skin!

"Edward, if you...I mean...since you won't tell me, then show me. Show me how you feel." I throw him an imploring gaze with lust etched eyes and he inhales sharply.

His eyes linger deeply into mine and a flash of pensiveness crosses his face. He's considering it this time, he's actually thinking it through! _Oh don't give your hopes up!_

Suddenly the softest, fullest lips capture mine and I moan inside his mouth. Damn he's good, and so smooth! But, if he thinks he's dug himself out this time, then he's sadly mistaken. As our lips continue to tangle slowly and heatedly, I figure now is the time to make my move.

I blindly search for the buttons on his shirt and undo them one by one. Too soon his hand firmly clasps over my wrist. He shakes his head, ends our lip-lock and retreats. I frown at him and feel my eyes water as he casts me a disapproving glare. I hate it when he does that, makes me feel like an ill behaved child and I need disciplining. It hurts being rejected, though I should be used to it by now.

However, each time hurts more than the last time he had. Why doesn't he want me? He knows I love him and only him, always will. I have proved to him time and time again what he means to me. I am ready for the next step in our relationship, I am sure he is too. It's time, isn't it?

"Bella, no, I can't." he whispers in a wistful yet firm voice.

And yet his eyes reveal a different story. He wants this, just as much as I do. His body always reacting to my touch is proof of that.

"Yes, you can. You want me, just as much as I want you. It's okay... don't refuse. Edward, please. I love you, I..."

I feel so needy and guilty, which doesn't make any sense. It isn't a crime to want to make love with your boyfriend, is it?

He shuts his eyes tight and takes a deep, long breath. "Bella, please. Don't."

"Why? You have never given a reason that has made any sense!"

"According to _**you**_. But to me it makes perfect sense. Bella, I'm doing the right thing. Any other man would be selfish and thoughtless. They would take you up on your offer, take advantage of you-"

"And I wish you would! That's exactly what I want you to do. To take me, I'm yours."

I use my free hand and attempt to roll up my shirt, but his hand stops my actions once again. I glare at him, frustrated. "Edward, why are you doing this? Why do you keep pushing me away? Why don't you want me?" I lower my head, unwilling to gaze in his eyes.

My chin suddenly lifts up and my eyes meet intense jades that display such sorrow and emotion, it practically guts me.

"You seriously believe I don't desire you? Trust me, I do. My pushing you away isn't intentional. But you were aware that being a part of my life meant things were going to be challenging. That it was going to take some time for me to adjust. Bella, I don't want to hurt you, nor mean to. Yet...on occasion I wonder, always wonder if... you're better off without me."

I shake my head, disagreeing and exhale shakily. I have heard this speech before in the past, many times. I understood why he said those things, at the time. However, now, those explanations are growing tiresome.

He's still frightened, I get it. I am a little scared myself. But, we have come this far and aren't we worth fighting for? When will he finally let his guard down and break the walls protecting his heart?

I take a deep breath and pray he will believe what I'm about to say.

"I am _**not**_ better off without you. I am a better woman because of you."

He shakes his head, frowning over my choice of words yet I didn't let his reaction discourage me. I couldn't, I just have to help him see reason.

"Don't hurt me. Don't push me away, Edward." I place my hands against his cheeks and he exhales gently, shutting his lids and leaning into the palms of my hands. "I will never leave you. I am right here. I am yours, forever. And I want to be tied to you in every way possible."

Intense pools of green gaze into my browns and my heart shatters when I spot the faintest trace of wetness trapped in them.

"Bella," he murmurs, his voice husky and trembling. "You shouldn't promise me that. Hell, I can't promise you that. Both you and I have no idea what tomorrow will bring. Don't...make this complicated."

I wonder if he even realizes it anymore, how much he's keeping me at arm's length.

Because of her, _**always her**_. No matter what, she will always drive a wedge between us.

I'm not trying, nor want to replace her. I just want to love him, for him to love me. For us to build a happy life together. Is that so much to ask? To desire?

"I'm not making it complicated. I just want..."

"Shh, I know baby, I know. But, isn't this enough? This moment, you and I right here, right now." Edward gently removes my hands off his face, circles his arms over my back and pulls me close to him.

His eyes waver on mine as a torn, sad look etches on his beautiful face. God, he's breath-taking; and still dealing with so much grief and heartache. All I long to do is take it away from him and carry it for him, so he will no longer suffer.

I finally nod in answer and whisper, "For now, it is."

He chuckles bitterly, places the lightest kiss on my forehead and buries his face underneath my neck.

A lengthy moment of silence follows and with each passing second, I grow more and more anxious. But then, those unsettling feelings are put to rest when Edward's mouth kisses my neck tenderly. I moan quietly and melt against his body, basking over the shivers that race along my spine.

As his satin feeling lips leave trails of heat down my throat, I struggle with keeping my emotions in check. I try not to dwell or give the fears I'm harboring a second thought.

But I can't help it.

I fear that he may never fall deeply in love with me.

I fear that he will leave me, and never return.

But above all, my greatest fear is that there may not be enough room in his heart for her, and myself.

I refuse to lose him. I love him more than my own existence.

Edward is my life now.

**~~~~TP~~~~**

**A/N: Whoa, I know, interesting beginning right? haa. I personally love the small mystery and romance of it all :) So, I have this feeling based on this prologue some of you may be wondering, especially if you caught this line: Because of her, _always her_.**

**Okay, allow me to assure you guys right now, this ISN'T a fic about Bella being the other woman, or about cheating! So, I had to clear that up. But, that's all I am going to tell you right now. *wink* You will just have to take some guesses, lol. Anyhow this fic will be dramaish/angsty, but not too heavy. I want to also fill you in on a few other things. The first few chaps will move pretty slowly, you will see why. Let's just say in my eyes it's necessary. However it will pick up pretty quickly soon enough! I will warn you when, haa. Edward also doesn't make much of an appearance in Chapter One, or does he? Things take a bit of time to progress between him and Bella, again you will understand why soon enough! I do plan on having a Epov chap pretty soon, probably after chapter two or three :) Speaking of the next chapter, chap one goes back a few months prior to this prologue. Just to give you a heads up! Also it will be posted very soon, I have it just about ready to go :) Just need to look it over, tweak it to my liking, etc, and send to my beta. I'm hoping another day or so tops. Then after that, I will try to post weekly, until the pre-written chaps I have are no more :( Also, regrettably this fic may not have a regular posting schedule. I have two other fics that really need my attention also. However, I will do my best :)  
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**Speaking of them, if you aren't... feel free to check out my other fics About That Night and Beautifully Broken, more info about them is on my profile :) I am sure you will like them. Okay, that's about it for now. I cant give too much away about this fic just yet sweets. But I do hope you will stick with me on this journey, it will be a bumpy one at times! But I am very much a HEA girl! So, with that, feel free to leave a review, say hello :) I do love hearing from my readers and reply to each review! You can also add my page on FB: vampgirl79Fanfiction. I love making new friends and talking about my fics, or anything Twilight related, haa :) I am also on Twitter:vampgirl792011. Till next time, I will have Chapter one posted very soon! **

****Thanks for reading lovelies, xo, Leslie**


	2. Chapter 1:Back Home and A Flash of Green

**A/N: Hello sweeties, *waves* Bet you didn't expect an update this soon huh? Haa, well I didn't want to leave you lovely people hanging for too long, especially after the interesting prologue. I love how many of you had so many questions. And some of you also had theories as to what you think the prologue meant and what will happen next. I was very blown away by all of the reviews I received, thank you so much! It was a treat to read and I replied to each one of them ;) Anyhow, real quick, I also want to thank those of you who added this fic to your alerts, favorites, etc. It really warms my heart! I am sure all of you are dying to read the first chapter, and find out more about Bella and Edward. I will warn you that Edward doesn't make much of an appearance in this chapter, sorry :( But I hope you will enjoy it anyway! Oh and keep in mind this chapter, and the rest of the chaps, go about five months back to when the prologue took place. All right, now on with the reading!**

*****Disclaimer: Not mine, boo! It's the great Stephenie Meyer's of course! However I am the proud owner of several Twilight posters, t-shirts, all of the books, soundtracks, scores, movies, etc, etc, hee :)**

*****My beta is the wonderful, kind and smart Serenshadow. Give her a BIG thank you for making my fics sound pretty :) Thank you from the bottom of my heart bb for doing such an amazing job on the edits! I dont know what I would do without you, I learn so much from you! xo**

*****I dedicate this chapter to my dear hubby, who has been such an incredible supporter, and fan of my fics from the very beginning! I love you so much for reading my stories and helping me along the way! xo**

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**Chapter One: Back Home & A Flash of Green**

**(About five months prior)**

_It was surreal when I watched my mother's casket lower into the ground._

_Surreal when family, friends, and other people I didn't know, comforted me with their words and embraces. Surreal when my eyes read her name on the headstone._

_Surreal when the tears finally slipped out of my eyes and my body went completely numb._

_How will I go on without her?_

_Can I live up to the promise I made her? Live on, for her. Create a beautiful life for myself, be happy, and make my dreams come true?_

_How can I even consider doing any of that, without her by my side?_

_She was not only my mom, but also my best friend. She drove me insane most of the time because of her erratic and harebrained personality. Because of the way she saw the world._

_Because most times the roles between us were reversed._

_I was the one taking care of her, reminded her of her responsibilities. Yet, that was fine because it made my life interesting and fulfilled._

_Now I feel I have no purpose in life...not without her._

_I'm just this new walking, breathing, very unsociable version of me._

_I will never be myself again._

_God, I miss her like crazy._

_But for her I will try my best to honor her wishes._

_Starting with doing the one thing I truly don't want to do; moving back to Forks._

_And reconnecting with my father, who I haven't seen and spoken much to in five years._

_So much has changed since then._

_I'm older; no longer the little girl I was when I last spent a summer vacation with him. I have changed...but apparently the sleepy town of Forks hasn't._

_Neither has Charlie._

_He's still the Chief of Police._

_Still has the same mustache that my hand used to pull on when I was six._

_Still has the same build, with the exception of his stomach; it's gotten rounder since the last time I saw him._

_He also appears tired and older._

_Aging hasn't been so kind to him._

_Other than that, little else has changed._

_He still lives in the same small white house he shared with my mother, back when they were married._

_Oddly, I find it comforting and a part of me needs that right now._

_To feel comforted._

_While the other half of me, feels anxious as hell. Change and I don't exactly see eye to eye._

_The not knowing what lies ahead, frightens me._

_But, I promised her…and I intend to keep my word._

**~~~~TP~~~~**

Charlie's gruff voice pulls me from my thoughts. "So, ah, welcome home Bells."

I glance out the car window and eye the very house I recall spending many summers in when I was younger.

It's unreal, like I had never left.

I help Charlie gather my belongings out of the trunk of his police cruiser and slowly stroll behind him as he leads the way towards the house. The second my feet enter inside, a wave of solace and familiarity strikes me.

The entire living area smells of Charlie; a combination of Old Spice cologne, cigars and his favorite brand of beer.

I wrinkle my nose in distaste and narrow my eyes as I catch a glimpse of the disorganized state the living room is under.

Men!

Some things have to change around here if I want this place tolerable to live in.

I sigh, pick up my bags and follow my father up the stairs as he heads to my bedroom.

Oh Jesus, it's as if I climbed inside a time machine and went back in time.

My bedroom from childhood is the same as I exactly left it. Well, at least he removed the posters of actors and singers I adored when I was twelve.

However, he didn't bother touching the books that are neatly stacked on my bookshelf. I held back a snort as my eyes linger on a Babysitters Club book.

That has got to go!

I did notice a few differences, one of them being a desk that's placed over in the corner of the room. There's even a new bedspread, complete with sheets and pillow cases; which are folded neatly on top of my bed. Hmm, it's purple, and pretty. I kind of like it. At least it's more mature compared to the flowers and rainbows set I used to have.

"I bought the desk from a co-worker at the station." Charlie explains, answering my internal question and breaking the lengthy, awkward silence. "And I also purchased a pretty good work lamp. It's for, you know, when you do your homework and such." His eyes move to the window and he places his hands inside his pants pockets.

Believe me, this is just as weird for me as it is for you dad. It's been such a long time since I've seen him, and prior to that we kept in touch through once-a month calls.

It took my mother's passing for us to reunite…sad if you think about it.

"I had planned on buying you a used computer, but then I remembered you have a uh..."

"Laptop, dad." I supply, my gaze landing on my childhood bed. "Speaking of, there is internet connection here, right? I mean you do have..."

Charlie stares at me like I've grown a second head and I groan in my mind. Oh, right. Charlie still lives in the prehistoric era. I mean, for god sakes the man still uses a land line! Who does now in this day and age? Not to mention he has basic cable, I believe, so why not have internet access also?

_For one thing, he doesn't own a computer and he isn't spoiled __like you when it comes to owning the finest in modern technology._

Yeah, well, my Iphone is a Godsend and I'm proud to own it!

_Here's a reminder for you... you're now living in one of the most boring, ordinary towns that exist. Welcome to small town life!_

The very reminder makes me cringe. However, I need to suck it up and deal. For Mom, like I promised.

Charlie clears his throat, saunters towards the doorway, then turns around and faces me. "Yes, I'm aware I remain in the stone age." His attempt at humor isn't so awful and I crack a smile.

He returns it and chuckles under his breath while rocking back and forth on his heels. "Listen, I think; and you didn't hear this from me, that there might be internet signal your computer can pick up from one of the neighbors."

He flashes a smirk and I laugh, shaking my head. "You do realize you suggested something illegal, right Chief?"

Charlie laughs deeply and his cheeks lightly flush. "I don't know what you're talking about Bells."

I nod, catching on to his cryptic words, and smile.

Another moment of quiet lingers and then Charlie breaks the ice again. "So, um, the bedspread, is it all right? Not too... babyish? Sue said it's what a teenage girl would probably..."

"Sue?" I cut in, my curiosity peaking at the mention of a woman's name.

Charlie casts me a deliberate look. "Yes, Sue. Sue Clearwater, friend of Billy Black's. You remember the Black's, don't you Bell? You used to bike ride with his son Jacob years ago."

I nod as a flash of memory crosses my mind, reminding me about my father's best friend and his family. It's been a long time since I've heard any of their names. Normally when Charlie and I talked on the phone, it was brief. The topics at the time only being about school and life with mom in Florida. Then on occasion, Charlie would mention his friends, who live over at La Push reservation. He would also talk about the big fish he caught while out fishing with Billy and he rarely mentioned his job.

I force myself back to the present and eye the comforter set again. Truthfully, it isn't my style, but at least it's not too girly. My eyes then roam around the modest room and several ideas pop in my mind. This room definitely needs a makeover and that will be the first thing listed on my priority list.

I finally respond to Charlie's previous question, setting his worries at ease. "Yeah, it's cool. I like it, thanks."

He nods stiffly. "No problem. Oh and you do remember there's only one bathroom here, right? It's just outside of your room here." He gestures his head towards the hallway and I stop myself from groaning in disappointment.

Right, one bathroom. Perfect. Lucky for him I'm not like most teenage girls, who spend countless hours dolling themselves up in front of the mirror. Hell, I only wear make-up on occasion.

"Sure, I remember, and no problem." I answer and cross the two steps necessary to reach the bed.

I sit down on the edge of it and turn to face Charlie. He exhales, withdraws his hands out of his pockets and glances absentmindedly at my door.

"Well kiddo, hate to do this to you... but I need to get ready for work." Work? But it's six in the evening; I thought he worked during the day!

As if Charlie tapped in my thoughts once again, he clarifies, "When you spent summers and holidays here I did my best to work normal hours so that I could be home during the evenings. But, over the last few years I work nights, or whenever I'm needed. I won't be long, just have some paperwork to take care of and read over some case files."

His expression is pensive and then apologetic, "Damn! Sorry kid, you must be starving."

Right on cue my stomach quietly growls and I nod my head in reply. "Well, I don't have much food around here. So how about I order us some pizza?"

Pizza? I like it, from time to time. But I can't imagine what the pizza here in Forks tastes like. I made a face, displaying my uncertainty and Charlie laughs. "I'm sure the pizza here pales in comparison to what you had over in Florida. But, it's pretty decent."

He shrugs and I ponder for a moment, then ask, "Is there a Chinese place around here? I can order some take-"

Charlie snorts and glares at me incredulously. "Bells, this is Forks. The closest Chinese restaurant is about thirty minutes away in Port Angeles."

My eyes widen in shock. Thirty minutes away? Jesus, I really am living in the middle of no where! No wonder mom disliked Forks so much.

"I can order you some food from the diner." Charlie offered. I wrinkle my nose in distaste and Charlie throws me an irritating look.

God, he probably thinks I'm such a spoiled snob! I didn't realize how much my life, and Charlie's, seemed worlds apart, until now. Jacksonville is like another country different compared to Forks. God, I miss it there already.

I miss the sun, the heat and the scent of the ocean...

"Bella?" I snap back to Earth and recollect Charlie's previous question.

"Oh, um, no thanks. You don't have to do that. In fact," I spring up from the bed and walk out of my room, brushing past Charlie along the way. "I want to cook. Let me see what there is in the kitchen. I'm sure with whatever is there I can invent something edible to eat."

"Ah, Bells, wait..."

I climb down the stairs and head over to the kitchen. After entering I search for the pantry, open it and look inside, finding it completely bare. Shit, he wasn't exaggerating, there's absolutely no food in here! Well, any I could make a decent meal with anyway. I sigh and navigate over to the refrigerator. God, how does he survive like this? I shake my head and study the fridge's contents: a six pack of beer, a carton of milk, a half loaf of bread and a pitcher of what appears to be Ice Tea.

All right, I need to add grocery shopping to my priorities list too. I shut the door, spin around and stare at Charlie, whose leaning against the entry way with an amused grin.

I inhale sharply and roll my eyes. "Looks like we're ordering pizza."

**~~~~TP~~~~**

A firm tap on my door startles me as I'm redecorating the bedroom.

"Hey Bells, can I come in?"

I wonder if I'll ever adjust to living under the same roof as my dad, again. Suppose my new life will take getting used to.

"Sure!" I respond, turning my head and watch Charlie tentatively enter inside.

He nods in approval, his brown eyes assessing the space. "It's looking nice kid."

I try my hardest to refrain from frowning. I sort of don't like him calling me that. I'm no longer seven years old after all.

"Thanks, I'm just, well I don't know what I'm doing really." I shrug and glance around my slightly improved room. "Just thought it could use a little bit of change."

Truthfully, so much more needs to be done. But for now, it's a start.

"Well, I'm off to work. Need anything, or want me to pick you up something from the store on the way home?"

I shake my head no in answer. "No, I'm good. Well, see you later. And be careful."

"Always am." Charlie smiles warmly and turns on his heel to leave, but then stops halfway.

He appears hesitant, mulling over what he's about to say and I raise my brow questioningly. "You will be okay alone, right?"

I was incapable to cease myself from laughing. "Dad, no offense but I'm not a little girl anymore. I'm seventeen now and very capable of taking care of myself. Renee, I mean mom, had to leave me alone often when she went to work. So..."

A flash of wistfulness crosses Charlie's face and my heart aches. This is the first time, since the funeral, I witness him show any emotion regarding Renee. My mother's death impacts him greatly as well, much more than he's leading on. She was his first love and ex-wife after all. He misses her, just as much as I do.

"Yeah, of course." Charlie mutters and shuffles his feet uncomfortably. "Well, just in case, to give me peace of mind, there's a firearm tucked underneath my mattress. It's loaded and uh, ready in case of-"

"Oh for God sakes dad! There's no way I'm touching or using a-"

He eyes me sternly, silencing me instantly and continues, "There's also a baseball bat right behind the door. It's made of metal, so if you give the intruder a nice, strong swing-"

"Dad, please!" I groan in protest. "Is this really necessary?"

I mean this is Forks, what other place is safer?

"Just humor me Bella. I may be leaving you alone often at night and I would feel more at ease if you take this seriously."

I'm unsuccessful at holding back from chuckling again. "Charlie, this is Forks. Forks! I mean, when was the last big murder committed? Like twenty years ago?"

Charlie frowns in disapproval, crosses his arms over his chest and processes my question. The expression on his face clearly giving away what he's thinking. See, I am right!

However, just to be sure, I raise my eyebrow in challenge. "Well?"

"Bella, just promise me you will be careful, all right?"

Fine, I will cut the old man a break. It's understandable he's more on edge and overly concerned for my well being. He's probably scared of losing his only child, the loss of Renee heightening that fear greatly.

I sigh and wave my hands in surrender. "Fine dad, now go. Don't you have some _important_ paperwork to do?" I tease in a voice etched with sarcasm.

"Hey, I'll have you know my job is more than just paperwork and sitting at the desk Bells." Charlie grumbles defensively and I laugh as we leave my room then descend down the stairs. "Just last week I caught a few punk ass kids red-handed, graffiting over at the-"

"Graffiting? Wow dad that's serious! How long were they in for, a night or two?"

Charlie laughs under his breath, then clears his throat. The look on his face is anything but humorous. "Listen up daughter of mine, that's a serious offense you know."

I roll my eyes and pursue behind him as he leads the way to the front door. "I'm sure it is Charlie. See you later."

I watch as he unlocks the door, opens it and climbs down the porch steps. I lean against the doorjamb and Charlie turns his head, then glances at me from behind his shoulder. "Lock the door behind you kiddo, and don't stay up too late."

I frown at him, irritated and fold my arms around my middle. Apparently he still thinks of me as a child! "Dad, I'm almost an adult and it's summer. Are you seriously giving me a curfew?"

"Night Bells."

Ugh, I don't think I will ever get used to being raised by a father! Is he always going to be so over-protective? Jesus, at least with mom she was pretty laid back. I didn't have much of a curfew or many rules to follow.

_Well, that was Renee and she's gone now. You need to adjust to what's been handed to you._

I exhale heavily and watch Charlie's police cruiser drive away before going back inside the house.

After shutting and locking the door, my eyes land on a metal baseball bat right against the corner. Shit, he wasn't kidding around after all! I shake my head in amusement and study the now silent, empty living room. Yes, freedom! God, I never thought he would leave! Finally I have the opportunity to do what I've been wanting to, since before I left for the airport earlier today.

Quickly, I bolt up-stairs, direct back inside my room and search for one of my luggage cases. Once I find the particular one I need, I pick it up and place it down on the bed. Frantically, I unzip it, dig inside, and to my relief discover what I was searching for. Lord, I need one of these, immediately! I practically sprint over by the window, unlock it, and pull it up. I shiver when a blast of cool air attacks me and goose-bumps instantly cover my arms.

"Fuck, how is it this cold in June?" I mutter angrily, removing one of the cigarettes out of the box and hurriedly lit it.

I set the box and lighter down on top of the sill, place the cig in my mouth, then help myself to a long drag.

God, much better! I already feel a lot calmer. Hopefully I can get away with sneaking in smoke breaks when the chance presents itself.

Of course, Charlie has no idea about my habit. If he did, he would shit bricks. Besides, he's under enough stress dealing with me living under his roof again and grieving over my mom.

So he doesn't need to know this tidbit about me on top of everything else.

Anyway, I'm almost an adult and I'm aware of what I'm doing. I've read and heard all the statistics about cigarettes and the harm they can inflict on my body. That's why I only smoke a half a pack a day.

_Oh, like that makes it any better! _

I sigh and reflect about Renee for a minute. She was aware of my smoking, and expressed her major distaste for it several times. Yet, she didn't demand that I kick the habit. I hate to admit this, but that was part of her problem with raising me. She cared more about earning my approval and being my best friend.

Yet, what I needed was a mother. What I needed more than her friendship, was her guidance.

I continue savoring each inhale, while observing the view before my eyes, and snort quietly.

Awesome, I have a nice view of the next door neighbor's window; which is currently closed and pitch black inside. I lean further against the sill, deciding to have a few more puffs and wrap things up. Just as I was ready to put out the cigarette, I freeze in place and watch as light illuminates the room next door.

_Bella, mind your damn business!_

I ignore my consciences warning and try to get a glimpse of the person who had entered inside the bedroom. It's a man, with disheveled, near chin-length hair, tall in height and appears to be on the thin side. However, it seems he's trying to hide that fact, with all the layers of clothing he's donning. Seriously, the dude is over dressed for this time of year wearing a black long sleeved shirt, black dress pants, and a black scarf around his neck.

Huh, what the hell is that about? Maybe he attended a funeral today, because I'm unable to comprehend why a person would dress only in black otherwise. Well, perhaps it's his favorite color, or he believes it flatters him.

Or maybe he's in the mob.

Oh, right Bella. If he is in the mob, then why on Earth would he be living in a town like Forks? I shake my head over my absurd theories and lean out the window to get a better look at him. He directs over to his bed, sits down on the edge, and turns to his right; with his back facing me. Dammit, and I didn't get a decent glimpse of his face!

_Bella, just step away from the window and do something else, anything else. This is none of your concern! _Yeah, maybe I should just...wait, hold up!

I stretch out my torso a little more and I'm currently half hanging out of the window. If I lean out any further, I would fall straight down, and it's quite a drop. Certainly not worth injuring myself over.

But, I can't help it, temptation is a bitch. There's something about this mystery man that's intriguing. I study him closely as he reaches over, grabs a book from the top of the nightstand and opens it. Oh, he's just going to read, boring! I mean, what the hell was I expecting to find him do? Watching porn?

_Oh good God Bella, get your mind out of the gutter!_

Anyhow, reading does sound like an appealing idea right at the moment. I always enjoy reading a good book before I go to sleep. I am dying to find out what happens next in this hot vampire novel I'm currently reading.

I take one final drag, flick the cigarette out the window and move back inside. Oh crap! I probably should pick the butt up before Charlie arrives back, just in case. The last thing I need is him finding a used cigarette right outside of his house. I sigh deeply, preparing to shut the window but pause when a visual catches my eye.

It's him, the strange man. What's he...what is he _doing_? I angle out of the window again and strain to get clear view of what's unfolding. The man is gesturing his hands in mid-air and my eyes may be playing tricks on me, but it looks like he's speaking to another person. The question is though, who? Because there is no one sitting in the armchair in which he's facing. I observe in shock and bewilderment as the man extends out his hand, patting the air between him and the chair. Oh my God, is he seeing...is he talking to a...No, that is insane!

There has to be a rational explanation for this! My jaw drops as I watch him lean forward and then pull back. Did he just...kiss an imaginary, well whatever he's seeing? Okay, I think my imagination is getting the better of me. Perhaps I need to call it a night.

I chuckle softly over my stupidity and move back inside. Apparently, I motioned too quickly and banged my head hard against the window. I curse loudly over the throbbing pain and realize seconds too late the commotion I caused. Shit, good one Swan!

I notice a flash of motion inside the neighbor's room and panic grips my chest. Oh fuck! The next few moments happen so quickly, I'm unsure if it was actually real. His hand pulls the curtain roughly, permanently blocking my view. But not before I notice the deepest set of green eyes glare directly at me.

My hands clench the window pane firmly and a shaky, heavy breath escapes out of my throat.

What the hell just happened? I blink in disbelief and stare intently at the window across the way, noticing only darkness once again.

_Christ, that was strange._ I inhale sharply, shut the window and draw the curtain closed.

Maybe this was a daydream. Yeah, that's it! Because there's no way I just witnessed the next door neighbor talking to air, to a..._**ghost**_. I laugh, shake my head and stroll towards my desk. I seriously need to quit watching late night horror movies! I giggle nervously, plop myself down on the desk chair and power up my laptop. I figure checking my email and Facebook will be a wise idea to take my mind off the weirdness that just occurred.

After re-reading an email from one of my close friends back in Florida, I give up trying to distract myself. Since I was failing miserably at it. I just can't seem to erase the image of him out of my mind. His tall, lanky build, his untamed bronze hair, and those eyes…

All right, that's enough! I should get some sleep and dream about sexy vampires who want to seduce me. The very thought made me eager to lie down and shut my eyes. So I hurriedly change into my pj's, brush my teeth, and double check the front door, making sure it's still locked. What? After what I witnessed, can you blame a girl?

I crawl into my bed, make myself comfortable underneath the covers, and turn off the bedside lamp. Suddenly, I'm now wide awake, much to my dismay. My brain racing a million miles a minute, presenting me flash-backs of the day's events. Then, unexpectedly, my eyes at last feel heavy. My body also weakens and sleep invades me faster than I believe it would.

Surprisingly, the peculiar man's intense green eyes, is the star of my dreams.

**~~~~TP~~~~**

**A/N: Well, I imagine this chapter was probably not what you expected, hee. So, the strange man who lives next door to the Swan's is Edward, I'm sure you caught that. And yes, he is hairy, lol. I mean he has longish hair, just envision Rob when he had that head full of hair, but a bit longer. This Edward also has some big time facial hair. But I will hint it may not last :) Okay, so I am also assuming many of you are thinking... huh? My beta, after she sent me the edits to this chapter, asks me, "Is Edward a medium? Does he see ghosts?" I tell her, "I so wish I had thought of that!" I really wish I can tell you guys that this story has a supernatural twist but it doesn't. I dont want to give too much away but lets just say Edward believes he sees the ghost of his... well, you will find out soon enough. Poor guy is somewhat not in his right frame of mind :(**

**As I warned you all in the last chapter, these first few chaps will go pretty slowly. It's necessary. After this next chapter, which btw Edward makes his 'official debut'. Let's just say it's interesting and a bit unexpected, hee :) The chapter after, I think, will be in Edward's pov, so all of you will have a better understanding about him and why he is the way he is. I dont want to make it a mystery for too long. After all this story isn't marked as a mystery, haa. Anyway, I really hope you enjoyed the chapter, even though Edward is only in it briefly. I personally loved Bella and Charlie's banter. There's more of that in the next chappie. Oh and for those wondering, I will explain in one of the chapters soon how poor Renee died :( All right, I think that's it for now. If you have any q's, feel free to ask me in a review or by pm. I do respond to every review, so don't be shy, say hello :) Also, I was asked by a reader if this fic will have a updating schedule. For now, yes. I plan to post chapter two probably next week. It's already completed. I am tempted to post it sooner though, haa. But I want to pre-write enough chaps. So I am giving myself time to write more. That way I have more chaps to present to you lovely people. Also I have two other fics I really need to work on too ;)**

**Like I mentioned last time, if you aren't already, feel free to read my other fics. You won't be disappointed. One of them is About That Night, which I will be updating very soon :) And my other fic Beautifully Broken, soon after! Again I want to thank all of you so very much for reading, reviewing and everything else. It means so much to me, you have no idea! Feel free to add my fanpage in FB: Vampgirl79 Fanfiction. Its a fun place to chat about my fics, Twilight and more! I am also on Twitter, vampgirl792011. I would love it if you follow me, and I will follow you too! I do love to make new friends :) Okay, till next time lovelies! Have a great weekend ahead and chapter two will be posted in about a week or so, maybe sooner ;) xo, Leslie**


	3. Chapter 2: Diner Happenings

**A/N: Hola my lovely readers! Sorry for the mini delay with the update. But I have a good excuse, yesterday was my birthday, :) The night before, my hubby took me to Orlando for an overnight trip and we had a great time! I have to say all in all it was one of my best bdays ever :) Anyhow, I really want to make this a short and sweet note, so here goes... Thank you so much to those of you who reviewed the previous chapter! I am pretty shocked by all the response to this story with only two chaps in, lol. It means a ton to me, so thank you! Thanks for putting this fic on alerts as well :) All right, let's get to reading. Chat with you more at the end. Enjoy the chapter! Especially towards the end, it's very interesting, haa**

*********Disclaimer: All of you know it's not mine but the lovely Stephenie Meyer's. A BIG thanks as always goes to her for creating these wonderful characters and allowing us fans to play with with them :)  
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*****My beta is the beautiful and amazing Serenshadow who made my bday special by sending me a lovely card in the mail! I love it babe, thank you :) Your friendship and awesome beta work, means so much!**

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**Chapter 2: Diner Happenings & Seeing Mr. Masen**

Cold, soft lips leave trails of ice across my neck and makes a path all the way down to my stomach.

His tongue tastes my goose-bump covered skin and I moan like a cheap whore.

God, he feels out of this world!

I don't even give a shit that he plans on draining my entire blood supply, after he fucks my brains out.

It will be so worth it; just to feel his solid, muscular body rock with mine.

See, I've been having this same erotic, mind-blowing dream for weeks now. Every time we are this close to having sex, the dream ends!

Well, not this time! Since I'm unlucky in the romance department in real life, I'd damned if I have the same fate in dreamland.

I pant deeply and watch in anticipation as his head settles right between my parted legs. Shivers radiate over my spine when his frigid breath blows air right into my very drenched sex.

God, he's torturing me, damn vampire! I just wish he would taste me already!

Either he read my mind, or I voiced my want aloud because he laughs right against my skin. My entire torso shudders and a pool of desire invades my lower belly. I arch my back and shift down, intentionally rubbing my entrance on his face.

"Why you naughty, very eager human. Are you trying to tell me something?" his voice sounds like bells and etches with pure desire.

Hey, what can I say? My mind is a wild, imaginative one, okay? Lord knows why I dream about fuck-hot vampires who seduce me. But, I love it and really hope I won't wake up for a long, long time...

Knock, knock!

I gaze down at my sexy vampire lover in wonder and he shrugs. Then continues his head-spinning, arousing assault. Strange, I thought I just heard knocking on my bedroom door.

_Oh just ignore it and focus on the delicious vamp who was about to..._

"Oh, God, yes!" I cry out lustfully as my seducer slowly licks my folds with his arctic tongue.

His blood-red eyes train on me and a playful smirk creases on his full-shaped mouth. "Are you ready my beautiful vixen?"

I'm only capable of nodding my head in answer and bracing myself for the ultimate oral pleasure I will ever receive, dream or real.

Knock, knock!

"Bells, are you awake?"

Oh, dammit to hell Charlie!

Black clouds my vision and my perfect, sensual dream is no more.

My eyes flutter wide open and then squint, catching a peek at the morning sun that's illuminating my room. Shit, it's morning! What time is it?

I try to control my panting, and wait for my erratic heart-beat to relax, gazing over my surroundings. Oh, that's right, I'm no longer in Florida. I'm in Forks, still in Forks. I frown, eying the alarm clock radio on my bedside table and groan. Jesus, it's almost eight a.m. on a Saturday! Why on Earth am I awake so early?

A hard knock on the door makes me flinch and I glare over at it with narrowed eyes.

"Bells? Come on sleepy head, rise and shine! I thought I would treat you out to breakfast kiddo."

Charlie. He's the reason my amazing, scorching dream got interrupted and why I am up at such an ungodly hour! I sigh, rub my sleepy eyes and carefully sit up, pulling the covers back. Well, here goes. The first day of my new life in a small, lifeless town. Where I have no friends and nothing to look forward too. God, I miss mom and my life back in Florida terribly. A hard lump wedges in the middle of my throat and hot tears fill my eyes. I swallow and take a deep breath.

I promised Renee I could handle this and I will. I swing my legs around the edge of the bed and settle my feet down on the cool floor. "Yeah Charlie, I'm awake. Hang on."

I exhale softly, spring off the bed and stroll towards the door. Then pull it wide open and face an awkward, and weary appearing Charlie. He grins, amused and shakes his head. "Well, good morning kid. I was about to use my blow-horn to wake your comatose self up."

I glare at him irritably with narrowed eyes. "Funny dad."

"No, I'm not kidding. I actually own one and was this close to using it." The smile never disappears off his face and I mock pout, while trying to hold back from laughing.

Charlie, and his refreshing sense of humor, just might help me get through the sadness my heart is bearing. Oh, how I wish it's enough though.

I run my hand through my tangled, thick hair and ask, "So, what is this I hear about breakfast?"

Charlie nods as he rubs the back of his neck. "Yeah, I was thinking since there's no food in the house, we could go grab a bite to eat over at the diner. Sound good?"

As if I actually have a choice. I mean, I don't mind spending quality time with Charlie. It's eating at that hole-in-the-wall place I have a problem with. _Oh give it a chance! _I sigh and shrug my shoulders casually. "Sure, sounds cool. Can you give me about twenty minutes to get ready?"

"Sure, I'll be waiting downstairs. Don't take too long though, your old man's stomach is sounding like Chewbacca." Charlie winks, chuckles at his own joke and I shake my head, laughing a little at his expense.

I watch Charlie leave my room, and the second he descends down the stairs, I close my door. Then lean heavily against it and exhale slowly.

This is going to be a really long day.

**~~~~TP~~~~**

Just as I envisioned, the Forks Diner is a mom and pop type of establishment. The moment Charlie and I enter inside, the potent scent of grease and coffee invades my nostrils. I wrinkle my nose, repulsed and drag my feet across the floor as I follow Charlie over to an available booth. Once we are seated, a bubbly appearing middle-aged waitress arrives at our table and greets us. To my chagrin, she instantly recognizes me from when I used to dine with Charlie here many years ago. Damn, I did? Sadly I don't recall having been here prior to today. I must have blocked out some of my memories of Forks, or perhaps there was remotely nothing about those days that stand out.

After all of us conversed in small chat, the waitress Rhonda, expresses her sympathies regarding Renee's passing. I couldn't bring myself to say much in response, other than a cordial thank you. Charlie shares his appreciation as well to her and then politely nips the conversation in the bud. A few seconds of uncomfortable silence passes, then Charlie breaks the ice by telling her his drink order, and I mumble mine as well. I'm relieved that he had stopped the kind, but talkative woman, before she started sharing her life story or something. Once Rhonda was out of ear-shot, Charlie looks at me apologetically and extends his hand out, then covers it over mine.

"Sorry about that Bells. It's a small town you know, everyone knows about-"

"It's fine, no worries." I assure him, glancing over the menu for the third time.

I feel Charlie's eyes penetrate on my lowered head, but I refuse to meet his gaze just yet. I'm aware he isn't buying my blasé attitude about the conversation. However, I need to keep up with my show. I want him to see that I am strong and handling things just fine. Though deep down, the ache and loss I'm harboring is tearing me apart, little by little.

"So, ah, kiddo, you have any plans for the day?"

I finally look at him and refrain from rolling my eyes. Plans? Is he serious? What in the world is there to do in this town that's neither interesting, nor fun? Besides, I lack transportation; so that eliminates any opportunities of venturing out of Forks. Well, there's always option B. I could walk somewhere, to the park perhaps. I think there's one a few streets away from Charlie's.

_What are you six? What will you do in the park, play on the monkey bars? _

All right, forget that idea. God, this is going to be a long ass summer! I sigh sadly to myself, then give Charlie my undivided attention. I notice he's staring at me intently and it registers that I still haven't answered his question.

I shrug one shoulder, place the menu down and mutter, "Well, um, I dunno. I suppose grocery shopping is on the agenda."

Charlie cocks his eyebrow and his expression is incredulous. "Grocery shopping? That's how you want to spend your Saturday?" He chuckles under his breath and I scowl in his direction.

Glad he finds my plan amusing! Then again, it's only that, a plan. Since I lack a vehicle to actually take care of said idea anyway.

"Ah, yes, that was the plan. But it's a no-go anyhow since I don't have a car to take me there. But, here's a thought...I have some money in savings. Maybe you can take me car shop-"

"That won't be necessary Bells." Charlie grins from ear to ear, a playful gleam in his eyes.

What is that supposed to mean? Oh he's hiding something! So what does he have up his sleeve?

Before I have the chance to ask him to spill all, Charlie beats me to the punch and answers my internal questions. "Well see, Billy Black's son Jacob is great with fixing cars. He just finished working on a truck that was once Billy's, just before you arrived here. When Billy mentioned it to me, I thought about you and decided to take a look at it. I liked what I saw and I bought it for you."

Whoa, stop the presses! Charlie bought me a truck? Damn, that is...generous and unexpected. Not to sound ungrateful but I wish it's a cute, tiny two door car instead. I'm not particularly fond of trucks, but hey I'll gladly accept it. Oh shit, I have my own wheels! Ah, freedom! I can't wait to drive right out of this hole-in-the-wall town and head to a place where there's a movie theater. Hell, I'll even visit the mall, one of my least favorite spots to visit. Charlie's smile grows wider as he stares at me expectantly, waiting for my response to his surprise.

_Hello Swan, go and thank the guy!_

"Wow dad, I can't believe you did that for me. I mean, how awesome of you, thank you! But, wait," A thought crosses my mind and my brows crease together in worry. "How much did it cost? I would like to reimburse you for-"

Charlie scoffs and gestures his hand dismissively, "Don't be ridiculous Bells. I appreciate the offer, truly, but I bought the truck for you as a gift. A welcome home present to be exact."

A slightly awkward silence lingers between us and I try to dismiss my cynical ponders. For whatever reason, the word 'home' hit a nerve. I don't feel at home living here in Forks and I wonder if I ever will. Don't misunderstand me, Charlie's been wonderful and I feel very welcomed by him. However, my true and only home is back in Florida; in the cozy bungalow that Renee and her husband Phil had owned. That place was home and always will be.

I sigh quietly, shove my dismal feelings aside and smile halfheartedly for Charlie's benefit. "Are you sure? Really, it's no problem. I have the money saved, I'm not sure if I have enough to cover the cost but-"

Charlie chuckles and raises his hand, silencing me. "Yes I'm sure. I wanted to do this for you, so please accept it. I just... well, hope that you like it."

I beam as excitement stirs up in my chest; and I daydream about the trips I will take with my used set of wheels. "I'm sure I'll love it, thanks dad! So, where it is? I didn't see it parked on the driveway when we left the house."

Charlie nods and grins impishly. "You're welcome Bells and Jacob is on his way to drop it off as we speak."

I practically squeal in response and bounce in my seat. Charlie laughs and shakes his head, amused over my elation. I study his expression, spotting his glee and pride. I must admit, happy is an emotion I have not felt in far too long.

"Wait, now hold up kid. Don't get too riled up just yet." Charlie advises, looking anxious as his lips pull into a deep frown.

Quickly my good mood diminishes and I throw him a perplexed gaze. "Okay...why not dad? What's the matter, I thought you said the truck works great."

Charlie is silent for a tortuously slow minute and I tap my foot impatiently against the floor. "Dad...what is it you're not telling me?"

Oh God...I hope the truck isn't all beat up or seriously old or something. Anything else but that!

Just in the nick of time, for Charlie's sake, Rhonda arrives back with our drinks. She places them down in front of us, then flashes a friendly smile and informs she will return to take our order. I pay her little mind as my attention is only on my father, who presently appears all shades of guilty. Crap, how bad is it?

He sees the distressed expression I'm wearing and grins reassuringly. "Bell, relax, it's not that bad. It's just... all right let me point out that Jake did a hell of job on the truck. It runs perfectly, like brand new."

I furrow my brows and glare at him, suspicious. "Like brand new? Okay, how old are you talking about here Charlie?" My voice is casual, but on the inside I'm on full blown panic mode.

I don't mind owning a used vehicle and I'm grateful to even have one, thanks to Charlie. However, the look on his face isn't reassuring me at all; in fact it's giving away that whatever he's about to reveal, I won't approve of.

I take in a sharp intake of breath and present Charlie an imploring gaze. "Dad, please."

He sighs in defeat and rubs his hands over his face tiredly. "Honestly? It's pretty, ah, used. How old is it? I don't recall the exact year, maybe the early seventies..."

My eyes widen and keep my lips tightly pursed. Whoa, that's entirely too old for my taste.

_Oh come on, it's better than having no transportation at all, right? _I can deal. A brief flash of remorse crosses Charlie's face and I glare at him, agitated. I have a feeling he's stretching the truth; God please let me be wrong!

"Dad, it's older than the seventies, isn't it?"

Charlie inhales sharply and glances down at his folded hands that are resting on the table. "Yeah, it's from...the late fifties to be exact."

"The late fifties?" I nearly shout and Charlie hushes me moments too late.

Several of the diner's patrons turn their heads, glance in our direction and I blush profusely.

_Good one, loud mouth!_

I look at Charlie sheepishly and lower my voice. "Look dad, I appreciate that you bought this truck for me. But I don't understand how it runs well, when clearly it's been on its last life for years. It's ancient!"

Charlie guffaws and throws his head back as his shoulders quake. "Sure, she's older like your old man. However, she has character and trust me, she runs just right. I wouldn't have bought it otherwise."

I give him a skeptical gaze and Charlie frowns, then takes a heaping sip of his coffee. "Listen I had considered figuring out a way to have the car you shared with Renee shipped here. But it just wasn't possible. Besides, I'm sure you recall that Phil donated it to charity on your mother's behalf."

I nod, recollecting what Charlie said and a wave of guilt attacks my heart. God, I'm behaving like a spoiled, ungrateful princess! Renee would be pissed over my reaction. Truthfully, I'm a bit ashamed of myself. So fucking what; the truck is countless years old? I'll learn to live with it and like it. If Charlie vows it works fine, then I'll take his word for it. Besides, buying this truck for me was his way of making up for the lost time we haven't had together. Yet, here I am sticking my nose up on the present that came from his heart.

"I'm sorry dad. I truly am grateful for this and I can't wait to see it. I am sure I will...love it." I present a warm smile and Charlie returns it.

"I know you are kid and I understand your reservations. No teenager, especially the new one in town, wants a geezer for a ride." He chuckles and I scowl at him, showing my disapproval over his unwelcome reminder. "Oh and I do have a condition, of sorts, regarding you owning the truck."

I raise my brow curiously and ask, "All right, what's the condition?" I'm not sure if I like the sound of this!

"That you seriously consider getting yourself a part-time job for the summer. Well, well, speaking of..." Charlie turns his head and glances at Rhonda, who is approaching our table once again. "Hey Ms. Rhonda, you wouldn't happen to have any job openings for the summer, would you?"

I cast him a piercing look, which Charlie ignores, and I want to high-tail it right out of the restaurant. After I kick his shin first; I don't believe him! I appreciate what he's trying to do, but there's no chance in hell I'm working here! _Spoken like a true snob again Bella!_

"Why yes, we do have an opening! But, Chief Swan, why would you want to work here for? Did they cut your pay over at the station?" she teases and flashes him a flirtatious grin that makes me want to upchuck.

My father may be oblivious, but it's plain as day that Rhonda is majorly flirting with him. Eww, I just grossed myself out!

Charlie laughs and shakes his head in humor. "No, they didn't Rhonda, everything at work is just fine. I'm asking for Bella here."

My cheeks flame and irritation seeps in my chest as Rhonda turns to face me. "Oh, well of course! We would love to have you part of the team!" She throws me a toothy smile, leans over and pats my shoulder gently. "Do you have any work experience?"

"Uh, no." I answer quietly and glance around the diner, paranoid that everyone is eavesdropping. However, the customers are all involved in their own world; some chatting and others happily eating.

I lower my eyes and stare at the menu uncomfortably as Rhonda says, "Well, that's all right sugar. We could have you start washing the dishes over in the kitchen, then you can work your way up."

Washing dishes? No way, not this girl! I give Charlie a panicked look, hoping he would spot the message etched in my eyes. But he just simply smirks my way and then acknowledges Rhonda. "Sounds great! Would you mind grabbing an application for her?"

Uh, hello? I didn't ask for one! Who the hell is Charlie, calling the shots for me?

_He's your father, that's who, duh!_

"Sure, I will be delighted too! Right after I take your order, so ladies first. What will it be, sweetheart?" she directs her attention towards me once again and I take a deep breath, struggling to keep my irritation under control.

I swear a cigarette sounds perfect right about now!

I cast my sweetest smile and reply, "Actually, can you hold on to that application for me, ma'am? I plan on checking out other earning opportunities first."

Out of the corner of my eye, I spot Charlie glaring at me in disapproval. I ignore him and keep my eyes peeled on Rhonda, who appears utterly disappointed as she nods her head. "Of course darling we will keep one reserved for you, just in case. So what are you in the mood for today?"

I tell her my order and after Charlie gives his, Rhonda walks away. Immediately there's tension between us and guilt strikes me yet again. I meant no harm but I want to find my own job. Though, I'm unsure how much luck I will have landing one, considering I have little options. To be honest, I rather work at the grocery store than in this place. No offense. I explain my thoughts politely to Charlie and thankfully he understands. He also informs me the grocery store might be hiring for the summer as well, much to my relief.

So I assure him that when I make the trip over to the store later, I plan on picking up a job application. Naturally this makes Charlie happy and I'm relieved I appeased him. But, I'm no fool; I am also doing this so he stays off my back. I have a feeling if I don't at least show I'm driving around town looking for work, I will be working with Rhonda in no time. Besides, to be honest, a part of me doesn't want a summer job. The last thing I want is to interact with the people around here more than necessary. Yet, on the other hand, earning some money wouldn't hurt any and it would also take my mind off things.

Which is exactly what I need at the moment.

As we wait for our breakfast, Charlie and I engage in some casual conversation; catching up on what we missed over the years. I learned quite a bit about my father and also realized that sadly little has changed in his life. He still goes fishing every other weekend, watches baseball games on the flat screen with Billy Black, and rarely ventures out of the house.

I came to the conclusion that my dad seriously needs a girlfriend. I tease him about this and he rolls his eyes as I make suggestions regarding what he should do to get back into the dating world. Just as Charlie is listing off his reasons about why he enjoys the single life, a slamming, rattling noise causes our heads to spin.

"Excuse me, but what the hell is this? I asked for coffee, not warm, bitter water!" A male voice shouts furiously, grabbing everyone's attention.

I observe curiously as the waiter, who appeared to be around my age, flinches in response to the customer's chilling tone. He's standing awkwardly with his head lowered and his cheeks are a tomato red in color as he mumbles, "I, uh...I'm s,s,sorry Mr. Masen. I had-"

"Spare me the bull-shit excuses! Now listen here, you'll be even more sorry when your incompetent ass is standing in the unemployment line! I can't believe this shit! What were they thinking when they hired you?" The man's voice is as hard as steel and it sent tremors down my spine.

Jesus, what bit this guy's ass? Who does he think he is, treating that poor server like he's beneath him?

I glance at Charlie, throwing him a puzzled and baffled look. He shakes his head slowly and frowns deeply. His eyes are pleading and his expression warns me to remain silent.

"I, I don't know sir. Look, I'll head back to the kitchen and grab another fresh cup for you..." the waiter stammers, trying to recover but the irate patron wouldn't hear of it.

He holds up his hand in mid-air and cuts him off curtly. "Fresh? Oh no, this poor excuse of what you call coffee is anything but fresh. Just bring me my check. Now!"

The server looks as if he's this close to pissing in his pants. Or maybe he already did, poor dude! The guy is trembling from the neck below as he continues to stare at his feet, appearing shocked and utterly humiliated.

Okay, I've seen enough! I can't believe no one is putting this asshole customer in his place, especially my dad. For God sakes he is the Chief of Police, isn't he obligated to interfere? Without giving it another thought, I rise out of my seat. But then Charlie places a firm hand on my right shoulder and forces me to sit back down.

I glare at him in appall and whisper, "What did you do that for, Charlie? That assh-, I mean jerk, needs to be put in his place! Who does he think he is, bullying that poor-"

"He's someone who has been through hell and back. A man you really shouldn't cross paths with Bells. Just let it go."

I cast him a bewildering look, open my mouth to protest but the ill-tempered customer speaks again. "Hello, what are you still doing here? Do I have to retrieve the bill myself? Jesus!"

The waiter shrinks over the man's demeanor and livid voice, then sprints over to the kitchen. I shake my head in wonder, feeling sympathetic for the server who was treated so poorly. Then I eye the jackass customer. He's leaning back in his seat with his shoulders hunched and his head bowed. It's difficult to get a good view of him with that scraggly beard on his face and dark tinted sunglasses covering his eyes. His hair is also concealed underneath a baseball cap, though I spot a few strands of bronze colored hair peeking out.

Curious, I tilt my head sideways and study him intently. There is something eerily familiar about him. Do I know him? No, of course not! I don't know anyone here in town, yet. Nonetheless, I can't shake off this feeling like I've seen him before. Suddenly, his head lifts and he glares straight at me. At least, I think he is. It's hard to tell with his eyes hidden; which makes me wonder. Who the hell wears sunglasses indoors? Why would he even need to? This is Forks, the sun rarely shows itself. I shudder in my seat as his lips purse into a tight, thin line and his brows crease in anger.

Oh shit, is he giving me a dirty look? Why the nerve of that...

"Ah, Bells? What are you doing? Eyes on me." Charlie advises, breaking my train of thought and my eyes land on his. "It isn't the best idea to look at him, trust me."

I scoff, slightly amused. "Why not? Am I going to turn to stone or something?"

"Bells, I'm serious. Just leave it alone and ignore him."

Charlie's expression is grave and my stomach twists violently. An unsettling feeling invades in my chest as I mull over his warning. What's the deal with this Mr. Masen guy, anyhow? As much as I want to honor Charlie's suggestion, a part of me is extremely curious. I wonder what this man's story is; after all there has to be a reason why he's so cruel to poor, undeserving waiters.

Soft whispers capture my attention and I strain to listen in on the conversation over at mystery man's table.

"Mr. Masen, I must apologize about the poor quality of food and drink today. We are short handed in the kitchen and with our staff..." It's Rhonda and she's totally kissing asshole's rear!

Why? He put that server through the ringer and the ultimate embarrassment, what gives?

Mr. Masen, aka jackass, nods his head. "I appreciate the explanation Rhonda. But it's I who should extend my apologies for the degrading way I treated one of your staff members. It's just... I realize there's no excuse for my behavior, but it's been one of those days."

Huh? Odd, his voice sounds gentler. Almost dare I say, sort of hot? Nothing like it was just minutes ago.

Rhonda pats his shoulder reassuringly and smiles gently. Wait a second, why is he being handled like he's the victim? What's with the people in this town?

"I understand honey, you know I do. I'll go and extend your apologies to Ben. Now, are you sure I can't bring you anything else?"

Mr. Masen shakes his head and gives Rhonda an appreciative grin. "No, thank you. I need to be leaving now. But here's the payment for the bill and a little something extra for Ben."

My eyes pop wide as he hands Rhonda a wad full of cash and she gasps in shock. "Uh, no Mr. Masen. We can't accept this, it's far too generous."

He chuckles lightly, stands up and turns to her. "Nonsense. It's the least I can do. Again, my apologies for causing Ben grief. Have a good day, till next time."

Before Rhonda can reply, he strolls briskly towards the door, opens it and exits the diner. I glance at Charlie, noticing he had eavesdropped as well. He just shrugs, sighs and picks up a newspaper that's laid on the corner of the table. I blink in wonder, watching Charlie as he unfolds the paper and begins to read.

All right, that was strange.

Am I the only one who sees a problem here? The jerk-wad just hands Rhonda a shit load of cash and that's supposed to make it up for his unnecessary behavior? Also, shouldn't he be the one to apologize to Ben, not Rhonda? What a coward!

My eyes train back to the diner's doors and I shake my head, incredulous. Huh, suppose I was wrong about Forks being dull. Living here might be very interesting after all.

There's still one thing that's nagging on my mind. I am almost positive I know this Masen guy from somewhere... and I have a feeling we will cross paths again.

**~~~~TP~~~~**

**A/N: So...what did you think? This Edward is um... something else, right? I am sure at this point many of you still have so many questions. Lol. Believe me they will be answered in the next chapter! Because the next one is in Edward's pov, I am so excited! It was awesome to write it, but also very tough as well. Let's just say it's a emotional, pretty sad chapter ;( At least I think so. Also I'll probably split it into two chapters because of the length. We will see ;) Anyhow, what did you think of the chapter? Let's start with Bella's dream, lmao. Pretty hot and humorous, huh? Also, I'm aware it was the Bella and Charlie hour again, haa. But I personally thought it was great and funny too. I love Rhonda and poor Ben! There will be more Ben by the way, also Angela of course. And the rest of the Forks High gang in this fic. But, not for awhile yet. Oh and far as Bella not putting two and two together that Mr. Masen is of course the next door neighbor she spied on. She will figure it out in a couple of chaps from now, hee :)  
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**I realize it's still a slow burn. However, trust me, the next chapter is the beginning of what all unfolds. It will finally pick up soon ;) Well, guess that's it for now. Thank you for reading, reviewing, adding this to alerts, me on author alert and favorite author. When I receive those notifications, it makes me smile! I am going to try my hardest to put up chapter 3, which is Edward's pov, very soon. Its already finished, just have to look it over and of course, have my beta check on it too. Hopefully in a few days! Until then, if you haven't done so, add me on Twitter: vampgirl792011. I am also on FB under vampgirl79 fanfiction. Its a like page. But feel free to add my personal profile also on fb :) If you are interested in doing so, just message me and I will share you the link to my profile. Okay, I'm out of here for now. Till next time, BIG thank you's for all of your support! Don't be shy, please review and share your thoughts :) If you aren't already, feel free to take a peek at my other fics too!**

**Have a good rest of week everyone, Leslie xo**


	4. Chapter 3: Never Moving Forward

**A/N: Hello sweeties! Hope everyone is having a great week so far :) So, here it is, the chapter all of you have been waiting for. The Epov one! Personally besides the prologue, I love this chapter the most thus far :) Anyhow I want to make this short and sweet because I'm sure all of you are dying to read! Okay it's time for the usual speech, haa. Many thanks to those who reviewed the last chapter, to my new readers who added this story to their alerts, favs, etc. I'm very pleased you wonderful people love this fic so far! All right, on with the reading. Oh and heads up about a couple of things, first I have some great news that I will share at the end of the chapter! And also a warning: this chapter is pretty intense and a sad one in my opinion :(**

*****Disclaimer: You know it's not mine, I wish it was though, hee. But of course it's the lovely Stephenie Meyer's! What's mine, however, is a copy of the BD pt.1 Score by Carter Burwell, which I must say the music is beyond beautiful! Wow, just wow!**

*****My beta is the sweet and ever supportive Serenshadow. I can't thank you enough for your incredible beta work and friendship! xo**

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**Chapter 3: Never Moving Forward**

****Epov****

_The dream always starts the same._

_I'm standing inside a beautiful church and I watch her slowly walk down the aisle._

_Her wedding dress's long, flowing train glides delicately behind her._

_She looks radiant; happy and beautiful. God, she's incredibly gorgeous._

_Her eyes light with excitement and is also covered with wetness. My own eyes are watering as well; happy ones naturally._

_During that single, perfect moment I am the luckiest man in the universe. Because I'm about to marry the woman who captured my heart the first day we crossed paths._

_As she stands beside me and our hands link, our eyes meet. Her's reflect the same devotion and adoration as mine._

_Then, too quickly, the scene changes._

_We are now dancing to a tender melody, swaying slowly and holding each other tight._

_Bright, colorful lights shine down on us as we glide in circles across the dance floor. We are the only ones there since it's our first dance as husband and wife._

_It's official; we are Mr. and Mrs. Edward Masen._

_I gaze into her soft, glistened blues as she whispers, "I love you Mr. Masen."_

_I murmur my affections for her inside her ear and she smiles so beautifully it renders me speechless._

_The guests inside the ballroom cheer us on, tapping their wine glasses with utensils and requesting for us to kiss. We laugh over their excitement and stare into each other's eyes. _

_Our loved ones in that moment seemed to fade into the background._

_Only we are present in the room._

_I cradle her right cheek with my hand, angle my head and lean in towards her face. Then press my lips gently with hers. She sighs in my mouth, circles her arms around my neck and kisses me with such passion my heart beat exhilarates._

_But too soon, the scene changes once again._

_My eyes set on a cloudy, murky gray tinted sky. The sound of roaring thunder echoing from a distance makes me flinch. The sounds of churning water below catches me off guard. _

_It's then I realize I'm standing at the edge of a cliff. As I do every time I have this nightmare and it shouldn't come as a surprise. Yet I gasp, take a step back and anxiously observe the water that's a few hundred feet below. The dark ocean fiercely attacks the rocks and splashes of mist fly into the air._

_A blood-curling scream fills my eardrums and I turn my head, facing the direction the noise came from._

_It's her..._

_**Dear God, no! Please, no!**_

_As I run and attempt to find her, the scene before my eyes switches yet again._

_I discover her mangled, bloodied body lying in front of my feet. _

_Her beautiful, angelic face is nearly unrecognizable._

_**NO, NO, NO!**_

_I crumble to the ground, resting on my knees and weep uncontrollably at the horrific, gut-wrenching sight before me._

_It's my fault, all of my fault!_

_She's dead, because of me!_

_I __**killed**__ her._

_I pick up her broken body, cradle her tightly to my chest and walk. But cease dead in my tracks when a high pitched squeal makes my heart beat quicken._

_The baby's cries intensify with each passing moment and panic seeps deep in the center of my chest._

_With her still in my arms, I sprint as fast as humanly possible. Suddenly I'm no longer at the beach and now in the forest. The midnight blue sky is covered in stars and whispers from the creatures of the forest resound throughout the air._

_The baby's wails continue and I sprint around in endless circles, searching desperately for the infant. I gaze down and notice she's no longer in my arms._

_The infant's cries then stop._

_Now I'm alone, all alone._

_I scream her name and curse God for stealing her from me. Then blackness obscures my sight and my eyes fly wide open._

**~~~~TP~~~~**_  
_

I spring up into a sitting position and gasp loudly. My heavy, shaky pants echo around the once quiet space. A trickle of sweat rolls past my forehead and I wipe them off with the back of my hand. I feel hot wetness dampen my cheeks and I angrily swipe them away.

Every damn night for nearly two years I have this same dream.

It never changes, with the exception it gets longer in length each time.

I struggle with every breath I take and figure drinking a glass of water is a good idea.

Carefully I slip off the bed, stroll out of the room and head straight for the bathroom. After switching on the light, I gaze at my reflection in the mirror. Jesus Christ, why did I let myself go like this? I look like a forty year old man, not a guy in his twenties.

What happened to me?

It's been almost two years. The longest year and a half to be exact.

I should have moved on with my life by now and moved to a different city. Hell, even a different state, or anywhere else. Instead here I am still living in the very home we shared.

Though time has passed, I still feel her presence. I still hear her beautiful voice and sweet laughter in my mind, still smell her signature floral perfume.

It's as if she didn't, didn't...die.

Yet, her unworn clothes, and her side of the bed that hasn't been slept on, is evident proof she remains gone.

Gone, forever.

And here I am, stuck.

Stuck living under this roof, stuck in this dreary, small town and still stuck in this life. Ever since her death I've become a lifeless, detached being. Without her I have no life and no reason to live for.

I'm simply buying my time, getting through the hours, days and months until I see her again. Even though she had betrayed me in the most deceitful, hurtful manner, I'll always love her. And will continue missing her for the rest of my days.

There's been a gaping hole deep in my heart since her death.

That will never be filled, never be repaired and never be whole.

For the past year and a half family and friends have tried, and failed to heal me. To help me see reason, to force me to wake up and start living again. I chuckle darkly under my breath as the memories surface in my mind. All of them have given the same advice, offered their sympathies and comfort. But I've rejected every one of them, because I don't need them. I want to be alone, because I am. I'm the only one who exists in my bleak, empty world.

**Population: one.**

My hands curl into tight fists and I look up, studying my reflection in the mirror again.

Jesus, I'm in desperate need of a haircut and shave. I look like an old, broken, and destitute man for crying aloud! She would have hated what I've become; hell even I do.

Without thinking I allow the anger, frustration, and anguish to fill me. I start shaking uncontrollably and before long I slam my fists violently on top of the marble counter. I hiss sharply and curse under my breath from the burning, throbbing pain. I turn on the faucet and splash my face with cold water, forcing myself to wake up and snap out of my violent mood.

After rinsing my face a few times, I shut off the water and dry my skin with a fresh towel.

Time to face another day in my lonely, dark world.

I exhale deeply, shut off the lights and exit the bathroom. Then drag my feet across the cool, hardwood floor and head towards the stairs. Just as I climb the first step, I hear her beautiful voice murmuring my name.

"Stop." I whisper, shaking my head roughly and attempt to clear my mind.

Slowly I descend down the stairs and the wood creaks under my feet with each step I take. I pause at the final step when my nose inhales a potent, floral scent; which only belongs to her. I close my eyes tight, breath in deeply and silently count to five.

"Please, I beg you. Stop, just leave me alone." I mutter, my voice raw from sleep.

The begging seems to work; I no longer smell her aroma as I make my way to the kitchen.

It's been about two weeks since I made an appearance in the outside world. Not that anyone gives a damn, or I missed anything interesting taking place. Nothing remotely fascinating happens in this small town and because of that people gossip, a lot.

I know this since I'm one of their favorite subjects to discuss, and wish to fucking God they would quit it. I'm not ignorant, I notice the stares and hushed whispers every time I visit the grocery store or the diner. That's why I choose to seclude myself in the safe haven of my home and venture out as little as possible.

Unfortunately, I do need to pick up a few necessary items at the store. And I admit, I would like to stop by the Forks Diner soon. I do enjoy their coffee and omelets; the home cooking is almost soothing. Almost. Suppose I will make a trip to both places tomorrow.

Today however, there's another destination I should be at. But, I have to prepare myself emotionally before driving there first.

How do I prepare to visit the very spot where she's buried?

It's a struggle most days just to wake up and crawl out of bed. However, I have to be there. It's the least I can do.

_When will you ever stop blaming and torturing yourself? She broke your heart, remember?_

I shake my head praying my racing mind will take a break. Thankfully it does and I open one of the cabinets above the sink. Then pull out a thick glass bottle, containing a drink my throat is burning for, and place it down on the counter. After retrieving a glass from another cabinet, I twist the cap off the bottle. I grant myself a deep inhale of the strong scented alcohol and immediately my mouth waters. A hard knock on the front door pulls me out of my daze and I groan, agitated over the untimely interruption.

"Edward, open up. It's me, Ali."

Lord why her, why now?

I refuse to deal with her…today of all days!

I clench my teeth and pour the dark liquid in the glass. As my lips touch the rim and the drink coats my throat, another bang on the door makes me flinch in alarm.

Dammit to hell Alice!

I take another generous swallow, slam the glass down and turn around. If I just remain standing perfectly still and pretend I'm not home, maybe she will leave.

"Edward I know you're in there, you rarely leave the house! And I see your car parked in the driveway. You can't fool me, I'm your sister, remember? Now open the door, please?" Alice's voice is imploring and laced with genuine concern.

I sigh heavily, lean against the counter and frown deeply.

She just had to play the sister card, didn't she?

Well, it won't work in her favor, not this time. I don't want to see her or anyone else, especially today. She damn well knows what day this is! Yet she just had to drop by and check up on me, didn't she?

Typical Alice.

I turn around again, pour more whiskey into the glass and drink it all in one gulp. Fuck, I'm feeling light-headed already!

_That's because you haven't eaten in over twelve hours and now you decide to be a genius, and drink alcohol on an empty stomach. Moron! _

Sometimes I wonder if subconsciously I do this to myself.

_What try to drink yourself __in__to oblivion?_

**Knock, knock, knock!**

"Edward Anthony Masen Cullen, don't you dare give me no other choice but to break the door down! Just so you're aware, I'm wearing my favorite boots. And I swear to God if they get ruined because I had to bust this door, you will owe me another pair!"

Her normally bubbly voice sounds sober and firm. However, I know better; she's simply messing with me. My old self would have given her crap right back. But I'm no longer the brother I used to be.

I exhale in defeat because I'm wise enough to realize Alice will make good of her threat; and I can't let her do that. She's lucky I even tolerate visits from her. She is the only person I haven't excluded out of my life since Kate's... death. Alice didn't give me the option to anyway.

I head over to the door, unlock it and face an irritated looking Alice. For a short woman, she has plenty of spunk and doesn't take shit from anyone. It's one of the several things I admire about her. Still, I truly can't deal with her right now.

My sister's expression softens and she murmurs, "I'm sorry, I'm aware that I'm the last person you want to see right now. But, the thought of you being alone today of all days...is just unacceptable. Besides, I brought gifts!" Alice grins mischievously, her dark blue eyes sparkling with delight as her left hand lifts up a large brown paper bag.

I raise my brow in question and present her a disapproving look. She sighs loudly then scowls and gestures her free hand in mid-air. "It's food, courtesy of Esme, and a little surprise. Now come on dear brother, aren't you going to invite me in?"

I nod my head, run a hand through my disheveled hair and step aside so Alice can enter. Once she does I shut the door and direct us over to the living room. Suddenly Alice inhales sharply and roughly tugs on my sleeve from behind.

"Hold up! Edward, what's that...Christ, seriously? It's only ten in the morning and you are already hitting the bottle?"

I grit my teeth together and whirl around to face my sister. She glares evenly at me with one hand on her hip and the look in her blues rips my heart in two.

Alice's face displays a mixture of several emotions; disappointment, concern and sadness. I feel like utter shit for affecting her this way, but in my defense I've tried keeping her at arm's length. I never wanted her to witness me fall apart at the seams. Nonetheless, I don't care for how she scolds and treats me like I'm her child instead of her brother. I'm too old for that nonsense.

I match her glare with narrowed eyes. "Alice, may I remind you I'm way past the legal drinking age? Therefore I can-"

"Oh please Ed, spare me the damn speech!" Alice snaps indignantly, "There's a fine line between drinking casually and what you're doing!"

"Which is?"

Alice shakes her head, incredulous and throws me a pained gaze. "Ed please, this has to stop. The excessive drinking, your out of character behavior and the hermit life you lead!"

She sets the paper bag down on top of the coffee table and surveys the room, her eyes widening in shock. "God Edward, when's the last time you cleaned around here?"

She sighs heavily, bends over and picks up a dirty plate off the table, then proceeds to the kitchen. I block her from taking another step and she appears confused. "Ali, don't. Put the plate back, now."

Alice's expression is etched with bewilderment and I gesture my head towards the coffee table. "I mean it, put the damn plate back. If you simply came here to lecture me about how I live my life then I suggest you leave, now." My voice is sharp and low as my eyes are locked intently on hers. Alice winces and observes the steely look on my face.

We then immerse in the ultimate stare-down for a good long minute. When Alice recognizes I mean business and don't intend on backing down, she huffs then shakes her head. "You're serious?"

I nod stiffly and she exhales, then saunters back over to the table. She slams the plate down, spins around and faces me. Her critical etched eyes assess my face as she tilts her head to the side. I hate when she looks at me like that, as if she's a damn scientist who is studying a random object under the microscope.

I sigh angrily, the frustration I'm harboring causes my blood to boil.

"What?" I snarl, glaring at her heatedly.

"May I suggest you hire a maid? Or I will do it for you. Honestly Ed, how do you live like this? It's seriously disgusting!" she shakes her head in disbelief and her agitated expression switches to one of concern. "Edward, why are you still living this way? Why do you continue to avoid the people who love you? Kate wouldn't want this; she would be devastated over what you've become-"

"That's enough Alice! Don't you dare speak about her like you knew her! You didn't fucking know her at all and apparently neither did I." I run my fingers through my hair and fold my arms over my chest.

Alice casts me a pensive, wounded gaze and my heart drops to the pit of my stomach. I hate that I'm the reason for her suffering and I'm disappointing those I care for.

I wish more than anything I can be the man they once knew. I realize they miss him and honestly so do I.

My sister strolls over to the sofa, sits down and leans forward with her arms resting on her knees. She stares my way with a sympathetic gleam in her eyes and a gloomy look written on her face. I sigh quietly, walk towards the love-seat and plant myself down.

Silence lingers in the room for a drawn out minute and it's irritating me to the core. I'm not in the mood to deal with this since my mind is elsewhere and filled with thoughts of her. I just need to be alone and handle the grief on my own. I appreciate Alice's concern, truly. Yet sometimes I wonder how she deals with my bull-shit. I'm just waiting for the day to arrive when she tells me to go to hell, anyone else would have long ago. But not Alice. She has never given up on me and probably never will. She deserves a better brother, thank the lord she has Emmett.

"So Ed, how are you? I mean...how are you dealing with today?" her eyes linger on my face and I frown while rubbing my face roughly with my hands. Then I lean back against the plush seat and shut my lids firmly. Honest to God Alice acts more like my shrink instead of my sister.

I humor her and answer dryly, "Well, I'm still alive."

I didn't need to open my eyes to witness Alice present me a chastised glare. "Edward, that wasn't even remotely funny."

"I wasn't trying to be." I replied bitterly.

"Edward be straight with me. Listen, we all love you, we all care and want to be here for you. That's all. We're concerned because...I mean, I can only imagine how difficult today is. It being Kate's birthday..."

I cringe and feel a little nauseous over hearing her name said aloud. A massive wave of anguish and guilt strikes right in the middle of my heart. I swallow hard, take a deep breath and try to ignore the headache that's attacking my temples. "Ali, I'm aware all of you are worried and I sincerely apologize. But, I'm fine. I'm...dealing, have been for well over a year now."

I make the mistake of opening my eyes and immediately notice Alice's doubtful expression. She raises an eyebrow and cocks her head sideways. "Really, you're fine? Well, that's the understatement of the year."

I glower at her and she gives me an apologetic look. "All right, sorry I said that. It's just...I feel so helpless. We all do. I try my best to reach out to you Ed and you just discard us. Look, I'm just going to give it to you straight, I'm scared for you."

My chest tightens agonizingly when I find a trace of moisture trapped over her eyes. "It's been over a year and a half Ed and-"

"I know it has Alice, don't you think I fucking know that!" I yell in a razor-sharp tone.

She shrinks in reaction yet I continue with my rant; the rage and suffering fueling me. "Any other normal, sensible person would have moved on by now. And a part of me wants to, you have no idea how much. But I...cant. Just cant."

"Can't or won't?"

"I don't know anymore."

Alice inhales softly and shakes her head. "Would you like me to accompany you to Garden Lake? I was planning on making a trip there myself, right after I leave. We can stop by the store and pick up some flowers."

"No, thanks. I appreciate the invite and thought but I should go by myself. I'll head over there later today." I run my fingers through my hair again, pushing the loose strands away from my eyes.

Alice frowns and gives me a lengthy once over. "You look like hell. When's the last time you've eaten, shaved, or better yet cut that hair of yours?"

I roll my eyes and snort. "Jesus Ali, are you now playing the role of my mother too? I don't need another moth-"

"No, you don't, you're right. Because you already have a mom. One who loves and cares for you very much. I understand you are battling through your grief but dammit Ed, Esme misses you. She's beside herself and Carlisle is doing the best he can to comfort her. But it's trying for him since he misses you too. Then there's Em, Rose and the kids...they miss their Uncle Edward so much..."

"Do you believe laying a guilt trip on me is helping? Do you Ali?"

She nods her head firmly. "Yes, I do. I'll say anything if it helps you snap out of it! Please Edward, come back to us. At least give Esme and Carlisle a call, I beg you. It's been months."

My heart splits a little more. I loathe myself for putting my family through this, for letting them down. But I'm poison and I refuse to drag them with me as I continue on my journey of self-destruction.

_You're allowing yourself to live this way and it has to end! Save yourself before it's too late. _

Oh, that ship has sailed long, long ago.

"I'll try Ali, but I'm not making any promises."

Alice shows her dislike over my answer by shaking her head and throws me an imploring gaze. I remain quiet, much to her dismay, and she huffs in frustration. "Fine, can you at least consider it, please?"

Damn her! I nod my head in answer, surrendering and hope it appeases her. I feel slight relief when she half smiles, then her eyes roam to the paper bag. "So, Esme cooked some of your favorites and wanted me to bring them to you. There is enough food to last you a few weeks. She made Lasagna, Pot Roast, Beef Stew, Chicken Parmigiana and more. You know how she cooks up a storm in the kitchen." She chuckles lightly and my mouth itches to grin, but I keep it firmly closed.

However my stomach reacts to Alice's words and growls hungrily. As I inhale the aromas that escape out of the bag, my mouth salivates. Leave it to my mother to affect my heart with comfort food, it works every time.

"Thanks for bringing it Ali and thank mom for me, all right?"

Alice narrows her eyes sharply as she lifts herself off the sofa, picks up the bag and saunters over to the kitchen. "You can thank her yourself next time you see her." She calls over her shoulder and I groan irritably under my breath.

Honest to God my sister can grate my nerves!

Reluctantly, I raise off the love seat and decide to join my sister in the kitchen. I lean against the entryway and watch as Alice places several Tupperware containers inside the freezer.

When finished she shuts the freezer door closed, spins on her heels and faces me. Her eyes are twinkling and a soft grin creases her lips.

"Oh and of course, Esme whipped up some desserts for you too." she chuckles, reaches in the bag and pulls out more containers.

I shake my head in disbelief and couldn't help but laugh a little myself. I think my lovely mother may have over done it once again. But I wouldn't expect any less from her.

"Let's see there's some brownies, cannoli's, coffee cake and... mmm white and dark chocolate chip cookies. Oh God, I may have to steal one!" Alice lifts the lid off the container quickly before I can stop her, takes out a cookie and stuffs it in her mouth.

"Pig." I mutter with a teasing smirk. Alice scowls irritably in between chews and flashes me the evil eye.

We then double over in laughter and once the sounds subside Alice says, "Well that's everything. You know," she gazes at me pointedly and smiles. "it's a good thing mom made these, looks like you could gain a few extra pounds."

I glower at her, pretending to be offended by her suggestion and she merely laughs. Then opens the fridge and places the containers inside on top of an available shelf. She closes the door and eyes me with a distressed expression.

"I do hope you're planning to go food shopping soon. Well, suppose you might not need much now, but still looks like you are in need of other things too."

"I'm aware Alice and yes I plan on making a trip tomorrow..." I trail off and freeze in place when Alice glares directly at the bottle of whiskey that's resting on the counter.

She wrinkles her nose in distaste and shakes her head in disbelief. Quickly, I beat her to the punch and speak before she starts to lecture me. "I already know what you're thinking and what you plan to say, but I'm an adult Ali. I have it under control, okay?"

"Do you? Because from where I'm standing it certainly doesn't appear that way."

I exhale and rub the back of my neck with my hand. "Yes, I do. I'm fine, honest. Again, thanks for bringing the food by and for checking in but..."

"I have over stayed my welcome, I get it. I should be leaving anyhow." Alice sighs quietly and walks over to me.

Once she bridges the distance between us, she opens her purse and pulls out what appears to be a DVD. I raise my brow quizzically and Alice grins, her face appearing slightly wistful. "Yes, it's a DVD that Jazz and I made for you. I figured, well we all agreed, today is the right time to give it to you. Feel free to watch it whenever you can."

She hands it to me and I accept it. Then I glance at it curiously and ponder over what's on it. Alice raises herself on her toes and pats my right shoulder gently. "Ed, I love you. Promise me you will try harder to take better care of yourself, please."

Tears flow out of her eyes and a hard lump lodges in the middle of my throat, my own eyes lightly swimming with wetness also. I nod my head and give her a reassuring gaze. "I'll try Alice and I love you too. You know that, right?"

Suddenly her small arms wrap around my waist and she pulls me in a tight embrace. I circle my arms around her lower back and hold her close. She sniffs quietly against my chest and I rub her back soothingly. "Ali, come on. Don't cry,"

"Well, it's your fault you broody jerk." her muffled voice whispers into my shirt and I laugh a little over her remark.

After we part I take a step back, lean down and kiss the top of her head gently. "I'm sorry for snapping at you before. For letting you and everyone else down. It's just I-"

"I know Edward. It's all right, no need to explain. No matter what, you are my brother, in every way that counts. The fact we're not blood related doesn't matter. I will always be here for you." she places her hand against my cheek and I swallow hard to keep the tears from escaping.

"Okay then, I'm heading out now. Are you sure you don't want me to drive you over to the cemetery?"

"I'm sure. I appreciate the offer though." She nods in understanding, then locks her arms around me one last time.

I can't deny that I'm eternally grateful for my sister.

**~~~~TP~~~~**

Moments later I accompany her over to her car and open the drivers side door after Alice unlocks it.

"Take it easy okay speed demon." I tease, referring to how my sister is a complete lead foot when she drives.

Alice giggles and narrows her eyes playfully. "Like you're the one to talk Mr. Speeding Ticket Man."

"That's _former _speeding ticket man to you._"_

It's incredible and comforting the way Alice manages to lift my mood each time I see her. I even feel a little normal, almost myself again for just a brief while. How I wish it was enough though.

"I'll see you soon." Alice vows, giving a small wave of good-bye and I shut the door for her.

I watch her fancy, over-priced vehicle speed down the street and then I stroll back to the house. My eyes land on the dvd my hand is holding and a flood of anxiety washes over me. For some reason I'm unable to shake off these feelings I'm having. It has to do with the dvd and my conscience is pleading with me to watch it.

Honestly, I am curious about the film Alice and her husband created.

I take a deep, shaky breath and enter the living room. Then I search for the television remote, pick it up and press the power button. After opening the unlabeled case and placing the disc inside the player, I press play. Once I settle myself down on the sofa, I stare intently at the tv screen.

The instant the movie begins and the title flashes, my eyes lightly water.

...

**~~~~TP~~~~**

**A/N: Peeks out and waves. Yes, I know I ended it with the dreaded cliffie, lol. Any guesses as to what's on the DVD? Was the chapter what you expected? Were any of your guesses correct? Do you still have more questions? I bet you do, haa. Because some parts in this chapter were a tad cryptic. Poor Edward though, huh? ;( Now you might understand why he's the person he is. He's went through a heart-breaking loss, really, you have no idea. There's so much more to it! A little more information about Kate's death will be revealed in chapter 5 and more later on in the story. You all will find out what Edward meant when he mentioned Kate's betrayal. **

**So I'm aware Edward is a mess and he seems big on wanting to torture himself. Then there's Alice, who yes she's his adoptive sister. Alice and Emmett are Carlisle and Esme's biological kids. Edward is not. You will find out more about that back story soon. Anyhow, I feel for Alice. She's trying her hardest to reach out to him, everyone in the family is and Edward just wants to be consumed by his pain, bitterness and loss :( In the next chapter you will find out what Edward is watching, get his pov of when he caught Bella spying on him that night, lol. Also his pov about what happened over at the diner. Things will get very interesting from here! Especially in chapter 5 when we jump back to Bella's pov :) **

**All right now with my news, eek! Some of you know, but for those who don't...Turning Page has been nominated for two awards over at The Wordsmith Awards! Yes, TP is nominated for Best Romance and Best Overall Story. I am beyond flattered and very honored by this! I am still so happy over it ;) Anyhow voting for the awards begin on May 1 7th and ends on the 26th. So there's a little time yet. But please mark this somehow, so you wont forget to vote for me, if you like, :) And please vote for all of the other wonderful writers who are nominated as well! The site is wordsmithawards dot blogspot dot com. My other fic Beautifully Broken is also nominated there as well for Best Angst! So please vote, with cherry on top? Beautifully Broken is also nominated at The Twilight Eclipse awards as well for Best Angst. Voting for that contest begins May 5th and ends the 19th! I would really appreciate this everyone ;) **

**Okay, that's it out of me. Don't hesitate to leave a review, I love to read them and reply to each one! I really do :) The next chappie should hopefully be up in another week! And a reminder you can follow me on Twitter my name on there is Vampgirl792011. I am also on FB under vampgirl79 Fanfiction which is a fanpage. Love to hear from everyone! Thanks for reading, it means the world to me! Till next time, xo, Leslie**


	5. Chapter 4: Reminiscing and Making Amends

**A/N: Hi lovelies! Happy Thursday, or Friday, depending what part of the world you live in ;) I'm sorry this update took a little longer than normal, but life has been a bit busy. Plus I no longer have internet momentarily, so it will be more difficult to post updates ;( But don't worry too much, I will post them one way or another, haa. I don't want to leave my sweet readers hanging! Anyhow, I want to make this short  
and sweet. So, quickly just want to thank those of you who reviewed the last chapter, as always it means so much! A BIG thank you to all of you who added this story as your favorite or on alerts. It really makes me smile everytime I recieve the emails for the alerts! All right, one more thing I want to say before you read, this chapter is pretty sad ;( Hope you enjoy it though, poor Edward, *sigh***

*****Disclaimer: Not mine but of course it's the amazing Stephenie Meyer's! And as always a BIG thank you goes out to her for letting me use her characters for my story.**

*****My beta is the sweet Serenshadow, who I just adore very much! I cant thank you enough babe for making my words prettier :) xo**

*****Oh by the way this chapter goes back to when Bella first arrives back in Forks. This is Edward's version of when he catches her spying on him.**

* * *

**Chapter 4: Reminiscing & Making Amends**

**EPOV**

Kate...

Alice and Jasper made this DVD in honor of her life.

I remember exactly when and where this was filmed. My eyes never leave the screen and a wave of overwhelming sorrow and nostalgia hits me.

The camera zooms in on my sister, who is clapping her hands and tries to get the small crowd's attention. The camera then zooms out and slowly circles around, showing familiar faces, including mine. All of our eyes were on Alice as we listened to her attentively. I recognize the room everyone is gathered in, my parent's living room. This movie was taken on Kate's last birthday and Alice decided that year to plan a surprise party for her.

Wetness clings to my eyes and stings painfully; but I manage to keep them at bay.

I'm standing right beside Alice with a wide grin plastered on my lips; and my face displaying the sheer joy I felt that day. I was a different man back then, one who was irrevocably in love and on top of the world. My old self, the man I used to be.

God, plenty has changed since then.

"All right everyone, listen up!" Alice commands and the camera focuses back to her. "Tanya and Irina are on their way over with Kate. She has no idea about this, obviously."

Alice smiles mischievously and winks for the camera. "Kate thinks she's stopping by here to have a quiet birthday lunch with Edward, Esme and Carlisle."

The guests chuckle and Alice adds, "Well, isn't she in for a surprise?"

She then turns to me and I beam at her as she asks, "So, are you ready, Edward?"

I nod. "Yes, I am. May I ask for everyone to gather inside the dining room and wait quietly."

Just as the party guests direct over to the dining room, Alice suddenly shrieks and jumps up and down in excitement. "I just heard a car door shut. It's them, they're here! Okay, Edward you know what to do and Jazz sweety, follow me."

The person behind camera, my brother-in-law Jasper, walks behind Alice and they exit the living room. Moments later the entrance of the dining area shows up on the screen. It's pitch black as everyone waits for Kate's arrival in silence.

Suddenly I hear my voice and Kate's. She is giggling and asking what was going on. I recall she was pretty suspicious when she arrived. However, I play the innocent role well and assure her there's nothing to be paranoid about.

Lights illuminate the room and the camera centers on me, Kate, and her sisters as we walk inside the room.

"Surprise! Happy Birthday!" Everyone bellows and the expression on Kate's gorgeous face is priceless.

Her hands immediately cover her mouth and her eyes widen in shock. I watch myself wrap my arm around her waist and place a kiss on top of her head.

"Happy Birthday sweetheart." I murmur in a voice laced with utter affection.

Kate shakes her head in disbelief and glances around the room where all of her friends and family gathered around on her behalf. "I just...I don't know what to say. I can't believe you did this for me!"

She glares at me straight in the eye and waggles her index finger in front of my face. "Hold up, are you the one responsible for this?"

The guests laugh uproariously and I smirk playfully at her. "Possibly...with a little help of course. Hope you don't mind."

"Mind? No! I love it, really love it! And I love you Edward." she whispers and looks deeply into my eyes.

Tears roll down my cheeks as I notice the adoration on our faces.

The camera zooms in closer as Kate's lips caress mine and the crowd cheers us on.

I whimper and struggle to fight back another round of wetness from escaping. I swallow the aching lump that's in the center of my throat and wipe the moisture on my skin away. I continue watching the remainder of the movie and laugh at many parts; thanks to Emmett and his twisted sense of humor. He certainly knows how to get people riled up during any gathering.

I cry quietly again when everyone begins to sing Happy Birthday to Kate.

With a heavy heart I look on as she blows out the candles, then claps and applause ensue after. Next it was present time and I was the first to give Kate a gift.

This particular part in the film became so difficult to watch, I nearly turn it off. However I force myself to continue, my eyes observing Kate's every move as she unwraps the beautifully wrapped rectangular box. Her reaction to what was inside is positively memorable. She practically jumps on top of me as she embraces me and squeals in delight.

I had given her, well us, airline tickets. I had made the arrangements that year for us to embark on a vacation to Europe. The trip was a month long and we had seen places others only dream of seeing. It was one of the most incredible moments of my life, and her's.

At least I naively believed it was…before I found out differently. That she wasn't happy with me, or our marriage, and she had led a secret life for months prior to her death.

I shake my head, ridding the dark flashbacks. No, not today! Today is about celebrating her life and I won't reflect about her heart-breaking betrayal.

A short while later the film ended and a photo slide-show of the party began playing. I press pause on one of the photos to have a better look at it.

It's a picture of Kate, one I had taken of her in my parents' backyard. The sun was setting behind her; the soft hues of orange, gold, and pink a sight to behold.

Yet it's the smile on her face, and the sparkle in her eyes that makes the photo breath-taking.

I stare at the picture for God knows how long, then spring off the couch and stroll towards the television. I lower myself on the floor, get down on my knees and extend out my hand towards the screen. Then place my palm against Kate's image and sigh sadly.

"Happy Birthday beautiful." I whisper as more tears travel down my face and spill over my chin.

I'm unable to bring myself to visit her grave at Garden Lake today.

I'm too broken, drained and grief-stricken to leave the house. _And don't forget selfish!_

I'm sorry Kate, so very sorry.

That bottle of whiskey in the kitchen is calling to me right now.

**~~~~TP~~~~**

I curled up on the sofa for the remainder of the day. Hell it could have been only minutes for all I know. I won't even bother checking the time, because it doesn't matter. Minutes, hours, days, weeks, and months simply have no importance to me.

The piercing, sweet melody coming from the grandfather clock in the dining room snaps me to attention and I yawn sleepily. Slowly I rise up to a sitting position and rub the sleep out of my eyes. I glance over at the window behind me and notice it's almost sunset. The sun's blinding rays emits inside the living room and I groan; I forgot to close the curtain all the way.

A slamming of a car door piques my interest and I turn to my right, then push back the curtain just a notch.

The noise is coming from next door, over at Chief Swan's home. He's climbing out of his police cruiser, along with a small, fragile looking teenage girl.

Hmm, so this is the famous Isabella Swan. The very girl everyone in town has been gossiping about for weeks now. During my last visit to the Forks Diner, I was subjected to over-hearing some of the patrons discussing Chief Swan and his daughter.

Apparently the Chief's ex-wife tragically died from some type of cancer, what kind I don't recall. Anyhow, I had listened in as one of the waitresses informed a customer that the Chief was granted full custody of Isabella. And now he's left to raise the teenage daughter he hasn't seen in years from what I overheard.

I continue watching with slight curiosity as he assists Isabella with her belongings and they walk towards the front door. I sigh irritably and pray in my thoughts she stays out of my way. I have a feeling she will because I'm positive the Chief will warn his daughter about the "possibly dangerous" town recluse who is not to be trusted.

I chuckle bitterly, finding the reputation I have in this podunk town quite amusing.

Quickly I lose interest from viewing the Chief helping his daughter move in, and I decide to make a stop over at the kitchen. I'm unable to ignore my very empty and starving stomach a second longer. Esme's delicious home cooking is just what I need.

**~~~~TP~~~~**

It's late and I'm exhausted, so I decide to retire to my room for the evening. I want to read for a little while before bed and distract my mind as it's been filled with thoughts of Kate all night. The temptation to engage in another drinking session is high but I think better of it. I already had more than my share for one day.

After entering the bedroom and switching on the light, my nose catches a recognizable scent.

It's hers.

Kate...

I grin softly and train my eyes over to the arm-chair beside the bed. I see her sitting there, looking lovely with a radiant smile on her lips and her face positively glowing. The rational part of me knows she isn't real and because of the grief I harbor my mind imagines her.

Nonetheless, that suits me just fine. I love seeing her, I crave for it. It almost makes me feel complete again and I feel like my old self for just a little while. Even though she broke my heart in the worse way imaginable, it doesn't matter. Not during these rare moments I have with her.

_She isn't really there in the room with you. You realize that, don't you?_

I smile, greet her hello and saunter to the bed. I sit down on the edge and turn to face her. It's then I figure out why she appeared; rather why my brain conjured her up during this particular time of the day. When Kate was alive she adored it when I would read to her and I was more than happy to do so. It was one of our special moments at night time. Well, besides the intimate ones.

I pick up the hardcover book, that I've been reading currently, off the night-table and open it returning to the page where I last read. I didn't have the chance to recite the opening line because Kate's quiet sniffles blew me off guard and I gaze at her in concern.

"Baby, shh. Don't cry...what's wrong sweetheart?" I ask while leaning forwards and rubbing her hand affectionately.

Of course, in reality, my hand only makes contact with air. God, it's still unreal how I see her as if she truly is in the same room with me. As if she's still very much alive.

Kate then declares her undying love for me and pleads for forgiveness as she does each time I see her. As always I reassure that I've forgiven her, that I still love her.

We share a gentle kiss and I'm blissful, savoring in this single beautiful moment. Every second is precious and I don't intend on wasting them. Soon she will disappear once again, until I see her in my dreams.

I pull away, look in her eyes and present her my crooked smile; the very one she loves dearly. Just as I prepared to finally read, what sounds like another female's voice yelling, startles me. I shake my head, figuring my overactive imagination is running wild again. But then I hear the woman screaming words of profanity. All right, what the hell is going on?

I glance towards the direction in which the voice came from; it sounds like she's right outside. Curious and agitated by the unexpected disturbance, I leap off the bed and storm over to the window. Then I pull the curtain aside and what I witness is appalling.

Isabella Swan is practically dangling out of her bedroom window and rubbing the top of her head soothingly. Her big brown's then lock on mine and I narrow my eyes while angrily clenching my teeth. Why that...she was spying on me! Why else would she be leaning out of her window and now looking incredibly guilty?

Her cheeks are deeply flushed as she continues to stare at me wide-eyed. Dammit, what did she see? Shit, what if she saw me speaking to Kate? Well, to an empty arm-chair. Christ, she must think I'm insane!

_And you care, because?_

My heart hammers violently against my ribs as the blood underneath my skin bubbles. How dare she! Who does she think she is, invading my privacy? Nosy little brat! I present her the most frigid stare and yank the curtain closed.

There, that should do it! Hopefully, that will be a sufficient warning and she will leave her nose out of where it doesn't belong. Unbelievable!

_Hold up, it was partly your fault for not having the curtain shut all the way._ Fine, suppose I learned a lesson from this as well.

I don't even want to give Isabella Swan, and what she did, another thought. I'm completely fatigued, it's been a long day. Wait, what about Kate? Kate!

"Dammit!" I hiss under my breath and search around the room.

She's gone, and my mind is done playing tricks on me for the evening.

Dammit, it's all _that girl's_ fault! Her with those doe brown eyes, her pale, porcelain like face and her long chestnut colored hair that hung loosely in waves. Don't leave out the tight fitted long sleeved shirt she wore that accentuated her round, perky breasts.

_Whoa, settle down there Masen! You glanced at her for what, a__ mere minute or so?_

Well, apparently just long enough to admire her sexy teenage body.

No, no, no! How sick am I? I'm old enough to be her older brother for Christ sakes! I'm utterly disgusted at myself for thinking this way! Yet I have to confess it's been quite a long time since I've had any form of intimacy. And I intend to keep it that way since I have no desire to be with another woman.

I exhale woefully over the thought and shed my clothes off, tossing them on the armchair. Then I crawl into bed; the cool, soft sheets are inviting and feel nice against my half naked body. I shut off the table lamp on the night-stand and rest my head over the firm pillow. My eyes trail up on the ceiling and I feel them become heavy with each passing second.

Slumber arrives quickly and to my surprise instead of the usual nightmare that begins to play, I dream about brown eyes.

Isabella Swan's to be exact.

**~~~~TP~~~~**

Headache

Nausea

Cold

Light headed

Sweaty

Damp

These are all I'm experiencing the minute my eyes open.

What a fucking way to wake up!

All thanks to the amount of alcohol I consumed yesterday. _Good job you idiot!_

Then of course the dampness is from the tears I shed during my sleep. The sweating and feeling cold are my responses to the usual nightmare I had.

I groan and wince as a sharp pain radiates across the back of my head. God, I loathe hangovers! I breathe out deeply, carefully sit up and immediately a wave of dizziness attacks me.

"Shit!" I mutter petulantly under my breath and slowly lie back down. Obviously I need to stay in bed for a few minutes and allow the symptoms to hopefully subside.

Huh, well what do you know? This is the perfect excuse to stay in bed for the rest of the day. It's not like I have anything important to do, anywhere to go, or someone to see.

_Like hell you don't! You will get your broody ass off this bed and face civilization today, is that clear?_

I roll my eyes and snort bitterly, then roll to my left side. Thank God for dark curtains. The last thing I want is for the sun's bright light to illuminate my dark bedroom.

_There's something seriously wrong with you! Alice is right to be concerned and was correct when she advised you put an end to your hermit existence._

I shake my head and pray my internal chatter will cease. Thankfully, a flashing red light catches my eye and my thoughts clear, for now. The blinking is coming from my cell and I move over to the edge of the bed. Then stretch out my arm and grab the phone. I groan after realizing that I didn't bother answering my phone at all yesterday. Suppose I should check all of the missed calls and listen to the messages before I change my mind.

I exhale sharply, scroll through the menu and stop at the notification message. It reads that they are two text messages, six missed calls and four voice-mails.

I frown and decide to read the text first. It's from Alice and she sent it last night.

**From Alice:**_ Hey Ed, it was great seeing you today. I really missed you. Jazz misses you too and sends his love!_

She also sent a second text immediately after which reads: _Take care of yourself. I will call you soon and don't forget to call Mom! We love you, Ali_

As if she needed to remind me; of course I haven't forgotten to give Esme and Carlisle a call.

I'm just...avoiding it, which is very inconsiderate and assholish of me. They don't deserve an ounce of my cold shoulder treatment. My heart crumbles the more I reflect about my parents and the heartache they deal with daily because of me. I need to call them and put their worries to rest. They probably just need to hear my voice to be reassured.

Honestly, I want to hear their voices just as much; especially Esme's. Speaking of, it's no surprise that the first voice mail I'm listening to is from her. My chest tightens and an overwhelming feeling of remorse consumes me as her beautiful, kind voice speaks into my ear.

"_Edward sweety, it's Mom, and your Dad too. Listen sweetheart we know how painful today must be. So we're just calling to say we love you and..." _Esme's voice quivers and I listen with a heavy heart as she tries to refrain from sobbing. "_we miss you so very much. Please consider calling back. I, we need to hear your voice, to hear it from you that you're all r__ight. No pressure, just remember__ we are here for you__ anytime, doesn't matter. Always. We also miss Kate too, so much."_

Esme pauses and my heart rips apart as she sniffs quietly into the mouthpiece. Carlisle's voice speaks softly in the background and I think he's asking her if she needs him to finish the message. Esme insists she's fine and speaks again. _"Well sweety, that's it I guess. Oh and your sister will be by your place shortly with some food I asked her to drop off. It should last a good while, I made all of your favorites. All right, I'll let you g__o. We love you."_

Tears clung to my eyes and my chest tightens agonizingly as I select the option to save the message.

It's official, I'm a heartless bastard and the worse son on Earth.

_No you aren't! Quit beating yourself up because there's no point! Just call them._

I sigh and listen to the next message. My heart drops and travels all the way down to the pit of my stomach when a voice, eerily similar to Kate's, fills my ear.

"_Hi Edward, its Irina. It's been a long, long time. How are you? I mean...I __can imagine what you must be feeling considering what today is. So, I, um... called a couple of weeks back and left you a message. It was in regards to a get together Tanya and I are having in honor of Kate's birthday. God I just...still can't fathom she's__ no longer here with us. She, she would have been twenty eight today_."

Irina cuts herself short, breaths out shakily and it's evident she's holding back from crying.

"_Anyway, I'm hoping you can make it to my home. You're more than welcome to stop by anytime. Tanya and I are planning to leave at two to drive over to Garden Lake. I would love it if you can make it. Or at least, if you just call me. Tanya and I are very concerned about you."_

I listen on as she finishes her message and once again I feel like complete shit. I should have had the ringer turned on yesterday, then I wouldn't have missed any calls.

_No, you should have called them to begin with you bastard! They are grieving just as much as you are, she was their sister after all. They're dealing with the loss and pain everyday too. Yet here you are, shutting everyone close to you out of your life so you can drown your sorrows with a bottle of whiskey!_

Kate would have been beyond livid at me if she knew. I take a deep breath and wait for the next message to play. The instant a very recognizable voice screeches inside my ear, I cringe and my blood stews rapidly.

It's Tanya.

"_Who the hell do you think you are? You could have at least called Irina back and told her you didn't plan on showing up; because we all know you are a selfish asshole! But no... I bet all of my life savings that your pathetic ass stayed at home and you drank yourself stupid while feeling sorry for yourself! You're a fucking bastard Masen! I will NEVER understand what Katie saw in you! Fucking prick! Don't you even dare call Irina back now, you hear? Or I will stop by and kick your skinny, insensitive ass!"_

The sound of a click rattles my eardrums and I shake my head, incredulous but not the least bit shocked. She didn't even pause to take a breath. Well, that's Tanya Denali for you. Always blunt and frankly, the biggest bitch in the universe.

Is that awful of me to say, perhaps.

Nonetheless, I have plenty of reasons for disliking my sister-in-law very much. It all started when Kate and I dated back in college. The second I met her sister Tanya she clung to me like a cheap perfume and practically stalked me. It didn't matter to her that her sister and I were exclusive and deeply in love. Oh no because Tanya is the kind of woman who is very driven and used to getting what she desires.

And what she wanted was my body; along with all of the funds in my bank account. Long story short, I refused Tanya several times and flat out informed her I didn't want her and never would. Finally, after Kate and I married, she took the hint.

Since then she's held a grudge and did everything in her power to turn Kate against me. Luckily, Kate wasn't naïve, knowing too well about her sister's devious ways.

Irina also had my back, stopping Tanya before she took things too far.

However, only a week after Kate's passing, Tanya didn't waste a single moment and attempted to throw herself at me again. The night she came over to my...well to the home Kate and I shared, she wore only a trench coat; with nothing on underneath. Shameful! Tanya had chosen the wrong night to seduce me, because I was heavily intoxicated and hating the world. Needless to say, I set Tanya in her place and she's left me alone ever since.

I won't lie, for a split second that evening I nearly surrendered to Tanya. I admit in my drunken state she looked quite desirable.

But I would have done it only for comfort and to forget, even for a brief amount of time.

Thankfully I was somewhat in my right frame of mind and I didn't follow through with it. It would have been such a monumental mistake. I shudder over the memory and erase Tanya's spiteful message.

I hate admitting this but Tanya was justified in speaking to me in that manner. I let Irina down and I hate myself for it. I need to give her a call and soon, to hell with Tanya's threat. For Kate's sake I will mend things with her sister.

The final message in my voice-mail is from Emmett, and the feelings of guilt continues.

I don't speak to my brother often as I do with Alice. The last time Em and I talked was over a month ago I believe and I also haven't seen him in several months. I miss him, even his wife Rosalie, and especially their children very much.

At one time I adored being an Uncle to them. But once Kate died, it became unbearable to be in the same room with all of them. Of course it isn't their fault; what had they done to deserve me dismissing them without the blink of an eye.

I just couldn't handle observing their loving family. I couldn't bear being around my beautiful niece and nephew and watching them grow. It was a constant reminder of...the child I would never father.

I shake my head, clearing it before the gut-wrenching memories surrounding Kate's death, and the things I uncovered after, surface.

I replay Emmett's message, given I paid minimal attention to it when it played. Then I half-smile from the sound of his booming, enthusiastic voice; it's nice to hear him and I make a silent promise to call him soon as well.

He deserves better from me and I resolve to do my best to make it up to him.

I give both Alice and Emmett a text assuring them I'm well and thanking them for being there. I also assure them that I will be in touch with them again soon. Some of the weight I've been carrying on my shoulders has been lifted; and once I fulfill my promise to Alice, the rest will be completely removed. I sigh nervously, sit up on the bed and scroll through my contact list.

When I find the name I'm looking for, I press call and wait anxiously.

My heart catches in my throat and my chest constricts when a gentle, soothing tone greets, "Edward darling! Oh thank God you called! Are you all right? I've missed you sweetheart."

At the sound of my adoptive mother's loving tone my heart swells. "Hello Mom, I'm doing a little better now. It's nice to hear your voice and I missed you too."

I have truly missed her, and Carlisle, much more than I thought.

Hearing her voice almost makes me feel whole again.

I am beyond thankful my family has never given up on me.

**~~~~TP~~~~**

**A/N: *waves* I know, heavy stuff, right? And I am pretty sure some of you still have questions, lol. I promise many of them will be answered in chapter 6, when it's back to Bella's pov. Let's just say she does a little digging about Edward, and finds out things, *wink* Now, I realize things are moving slowly and Edward and Bella haven't officially met yet. But oh they will, haa. The next chapter, which is again in Edward's pov, is very very interesting, especially near the end! The next chapter will also have his version of what happened at the diner. I'm really looking forward to sharing that chapter, I have a feeling you all will like that one ;) It's even ready to go. But with this internet issue it will be a few days before it's posted :(I will try to get to a computer as soon as I can, so I can send the chap to my beta. She will work her magic on it and then you all will read it ;) **

**Anyhow, so in this chapter you learn a little more about Edward and his history with Tanya and his family. You will learn much more as time goes on! And what did you think of his thoughts regarding Bella? lol. Oh he thinks plenty more about her in the next chapter. Let me just say it will take quite a while for him to warm up to her. But we will get there folks, dont worry. Hang tight, so much is about to unfold soon! Well, I wish I can say more but I'm here at the library and time is limited ;( So, hope you enjoyed the chapter and as always I ask sweetly to leave a review if you wish :) I love hearing from all of you and I do reply to each one! Oh and one more important thing, voting began for the Wordsmith Awards and Turning Page is nominated for Best Romance and Best Overall Story! I am also nominated for Best Author, Best Angst for my fic Beautifully Broken and Best Lemon for my other fic About That Night. I am asking kindly to vote for me, please? Voting ends on the 26th. You can google Wordsmith Awards and you should be able to find the site. Sorry I cant link it here ;( I would appreciate your votes so much!**

**Till next time you can find me on Twitter, Vampgirl792011 and Im also on FB, Vampgirl79 Fanfiction, its a like page. Thanks again for all of your support! *hugs, Leslie**


	6. Chapter 5: The Diner and Brown Eyed Girl

**A/N: Hi sweeties, Happy Monday! Bet you didn't expect an update this soon right? Haa. Well consider it a gift for being such awesome readers! I have been blown away over the reviews I received the past few days and over the response to this story. I am so grateful that all of you are enjoying it, asking me questions and are just getting truly into it! It makes me so happy ;) Anyway, I have lots more to say but I will save it for the end. So before we get to the chapter, I have to give out my usual thank you's. Thanks to all who have reviewed, favored and alerted this story. I love receiving each notification! All right, on with the reading. This chapter is again in Edward's pov and is pretty heavy with the angst. It's also his version of what happened at the diner and all that follows after. Enjoy ;)**

**Disclaimer: You all know it's Stephenie's, lol. But what is mine is the awesome Twilight collection I have :) For real, all things Twilight are Stephenie's. But characterizations and story line is mine. Copyright LK, 2012**

**My beta is the kick ass Serenshadow, who is such a dear friend of mine and a big supporter of my writing and stories. Thank you for all of your hard beta work and friendship, you rock!**

* * *

**Chapter 5: The Diner and that Brown Eyed Girl**

**EPOV**

The friendly chime of a bell and the familiar aromas of freshly brewed coffee and grease greet me as I walk into the Forks Diner. The scents are surprisingly comforting and I'm glad I chose to venture out of the house this morning.

I feel several pairs of eyes follow my every move as I stroll over to my usual table; a secluded corner booth in the very back of the restaurant. I plant myself down and glance over to my right, finding a copy of today's newspaper lying beside the salt and pepper shakers.

Perfect.

I pick up the paper, unfold it, and start reading the front page. Before long I'm greeted by one of the diner's assistant managers, Rhonda.

She is the only employee I speak to and the only one I prefer serving me each time I visit. I place the newspaper down, eye her attentively and present her a cordial smile. Her brown eyes light up and a friendly grin creases her mouth.

"Well, hello Mr. Masen, aren't you a sight for sore eyes." I blush lightly and she chuckles.

"It's so nice to see you dear, it's been quite awhile..."

Her happy expression switches to concern as she gazes at me intently. "How have you been?"

See, while the rest of this town lives for gossiping about me, Rhonda simply wants to be my friend. She has been wonderful and generous to a fault ever since Kate and I met her when we first moved to Forks. Rhonda is practically family to me and I have always appreciated her kindness and friendship. After Kate's death, Rhonda immediately expressed her sympathies by visiting me at home before the funeral, which she attended.

She loved Kate just as much as everyone else did.

If they only knew the real Kate, about the secret that she kept.

My fists clench over the thought and a wave of anger and sorrow settles in my chest.

"Mr. Masen, ah...are you all right?" Rhonda asks in a quiet voice laced with worry.

I snap out of my reverie and adjust my baseball cap. "Yes, I'm good. Sorry, I was..." I pause and decide to switch topics. "Never mind. Now Ms. Rhonda, how many times have I requested for you to call me Edward?"

Rhonda's cheeks flush a bright pink and I chuckle internally, amused over her reaction to my suggestion. She giggles, shakes her head and appears chagrined. "Several times darling, I apologize. But seriously, how are you sugar? You were someplace else just now. Want to talk about it?"

Damn, she's good. Nothing ever gets past her!

I release a sharp intake of breath, unclench my fists and gaze down at my hands. "I was just...thinking about Kate. Her birthday was yesterday and..."

"Oh gosh sweetheart, that's right! I'm so sorry." Rhonda rubs my hand gently and I glance up at her. "How are you holding up? Did you do anything with her family or…"

I look away as an ashamed expression settles on my face. "No, I didn't. Well, Alice stopped by though and we visited. She gave me a dvd that she and Jasper made for Kate's birthday over a year ago." I trail off and notice Rhonda nod sympathetically.

"How lovely of your sister to do that for you! You know, I can't believe it will be two years in November since she..."

"I know."

Rhonda nods her head again and pats my shoulder softly. "So, the usual for you this morning Mr...I mean Edward?"

I nod and meet her gaze. "Yes, that would be great. Thank you."

Rhonda gives me a gentle smile and studies my face long and hard. She sighs wistfully and shakes her head. "It's a shame you hide those beautiful eyes of yours. That you hide underneath the hat and the type of clothes you wear. Now sweety, don't you think it's time to take better care of yourself? Maybe travel the world and see what's out there? You are so young and despite what you believe, you still have plenty to live for."

A part of me agrees with her spot on advice and I'm grateful she gave it. Unfortunately, I probably won't follow through with it. Before I had the chance to reply, Rhonda strolls away and heads right for the kitchen.

Now it's back to my endless ponders and bittersweet memories.

A flashback plays in my mind and I find myself lost in its images and voices.

_Kate and I are cuddling in a booth right here at the diner. _

_We appear utterly and madly in love as we laugh over a joke I just shared. _

_I feed her a piece of my blueberry pancake and she offers me a bite of her french toast. A short time passes and our lips tangle tenderly; I can still taste her soft skin on mine. _

Her lovely giggles echo in my mind and I shake my head roughly, fighting the visuals out of my head. It's too much, the memories are just too much.

For God sakes I don't understand why I'm still completely hung up over her, especially after finding out what she did! I suppose it's true when some say you can't help who you love.

Granted, a part of me is hurt and resentful towards her. But as twisted as this sounds, I somewhat blame myself. If I had made her happier, perhaps she wouldn't have been drawn to _him_.

_That's ridiculous; you practically treated her like a Queen! You were beyond caring and loving to her!_

If that were true, then where the hell did we go wrong? Over a year later and I'm still searching for more answers; because I never had the chance to find them. I knew something was off about her weeks before she died and remember trying to confront her about it; to find out what was bothering her. But she put on a good show and insisted all was well. So I believed her and all seemed fine between us, up until that day.

If we hadn't argued, she would have never left and...

I should have gone after her and stopped her from getting in the car, especially when the weather was severe. Then she, and our unborn child, would still be alive.

_Stop doing this this to yourself, you have carried this guilt for far too long!_

I shake my head to rid my thoughts. I don't want to think about it anymore, at least for a little while; because it's all I ever do day in and day out.

I sigh deeply, pick up the newspaper and distract myself by reading an article in the sports section.

**~~~~TP~~~~**

Time has passed and too soon the Saturday breakfast rush begins. The diner is currently jam packed with hungry, chatty patrons and I can't stand it.

Luckily, I'm almost finished with my meal, then I can get the hell of here. As I'm drinking the last sip of my coffee, I hear a woman shout obnoxiously and my head spins towards the direction it came from.

All eyes are on Isabella Swan as she lowers her head and looks sheepish over her rude outburst.

I shake my head and roll my eyes, highly peeved by her inconsiderate interruption. That girl seriously gets on my nerves!

_Is it because she spied on you and found you talking to yourself?_

Fury consumes my chest as memories from last night resurface.

More than anything else, I feel a little embarrassed over what happened. Although I'm not positive of how much she saw, I suspect it was enough. Enough to make her believe I'm a loon.

_And why do you care what Isabella Swan thinks about you?_

I don't. I mean, why should I? She's just another typical, spoiled teen who most likely thinks she's better than everyone else. She's insignificant.

_Really, then why do you keep thinking about her?_

I turn my head away from her direction and lower my eyes, keeping them peeled on my now empty mug. I sigh deeply and fight back a yawn from escaping. Damn, I'm drained! The idea of heading straight home once I leave here and crawling into bed is very appealing.

_No Masen, not an option! You have shopping to do and you're also meeting Esme and Carlisle for lunch, remember?_

Right.

No more wallowing or allowing the darkness to swallow me whole. I need to make things right with my family. I need to be in their presence. They care and love me very much and simply want to help. But, what if I refuse their comfort and love again? After Kate's death I literally turned my back on every single person I care for, that she cared for. I was livid at the world and still am. I'm still furious, still hurting and still mourning.

I wonder, will the ache, guilt, and anger ever lessen?

Will I finally have one of those nights where I'll be able to sleep without having that same nightmare?

Will I ever be genuinely happy again; ever move on?

I bent my head down, rub my tired eyes with the palms of my hands and swallow back the thick sob that almost freed itself.

"Uh, excuse me sir?" A young male voice stammers.

I nod stiffly and he clears his throat, "Would you care for a refill on your coffee?"

I snap my head up and train my eyes on a tall, gawky looking high-schooler with messy red hair.

Christ, who hired him? He appears painfully uncomfortable, like he has no clue what he's doing.

_Maybe he's uneasy because of you! _

Regardless, I thought Rhonda was my waitress.

So then why did she send this kid over to my table? She damn well knows I don't care to be served by anyone else!

_Wow, take it easy Masen and remove that foot out of your ass!_

I nod again at the young server and mutter, "Yes, I would like some more, thank you."

The waiter scurries off quickly and I inhale heavily then breathe out slowly. I have to keep my temper in check before I take it out on that poor guy.

All of a sudden I had the urge to glance over at the booth where Isabella Swan is with her father and I observe them intently. They seem to be having a father and daughter moment, complete with laughs and wide smiles.

It makes me ill, sad, and above all, jealous.

I sincerely hope they realize what they have and don't take it for granted. The bond they share will continue to grow stronger and deeper as time goes on. I wonder if Isabella truly appreciates her father; treasures and embraces him with all of her heart. Sure they were estranged for a long time, but at least now they have a chance to start anew.

I will never know what it feels like to share a connection with my child. I'll never have the chance to love him or her, to teach them right from wrong, or to be the best role model I can be.

I'll never know what being a father is.

I close my eyes and will away my dark feelings.

God, when will I ever be whole again and finally get my closure?

I don't have the answers to any of those questions, yet there's one thing I am sure of. I'll always mourn the child I never had the chance to hold in my arms, kiss them good-night, or play with them at the park. Tears swim in my eyes and I hurriedly remove my sunglasses and then wipe the wetness away.

"Ah, here you are sir. Sorry for the wait." A voice quietly says, pulling me back to the present.

Oh, it's him again.

Quickly, I place my sunglasses back on and watch as he nervously pours coffee into my cup. I decide to drink it, minus the sugar and cream this time, and raise the mug to my mouth. Out of the corner of my eye I notice he's still standing there and I glare at him coolly. Though he probably can't tell due to my covered eyes.

"Is there anything else I can get-"

"No, just the check." I snap in a blunt tone.

The waiter nods, then spins on his heel and hurries towards the kitchen. Finally, I can have my coffee in peace! I take a careful sip and nearly choke over the foul, semi cold taste. What the fuck? I survey around the restaurant, looking for Mr. Scaredy Pants, and find him almost entering inside the kitchen.

"Uh, excuse me!" I shout and he immediately turns at the sound of my voice.

His face displays sheer anxiety and a hint of guilt as he strolls back to my table. The second he arrives I eye him evenly and raise my brow, casting him an accusing glare.

Unfortunately for this poor kid, my temper emerges and before I thought better of it, I slam my fist on the table then bark, "Excuse me, but _**what **__**the hell is this**_? I asked for coffee, not warm, bitter water!"

I notice some of the patrons are blatantly gazing over at me since I'm causing an unnecessary spectacle. But, I don't give a damn. Seriously the coffee tastes god awful and it needs to be remade! Not to mention this guy is pissing me off by trying to gain customer sympathy by acting like the victim.

_Well he is, you're attacking him for no reason! Don't take your issues out on him!_

"I, uh...I'm, s, sorry Mr. Masen. I had-"

Oh Christ, I have zero patience for his babbling and excuses!

"Spare me the bull-shit excuses! Now listen here, you'll be even sorrier when your incompetent ass is standing in the unemployment line! I can't believe this shit! What were they thinking when they hired you?" My voice is unrecognizable and frankly, it sounds pretty frightening.

Who am I?

I try to pay no mind to the people who are curiously watching everything unfold, until I notice _**she's**_ watching.

Miss Nosy One herself, Isabella Swan! And I might be wrong but she looks furious over what she's witnessing.

Huh, so she has a soft spot for the server, does she?

_No, she's probably mad because she thinks you're behaving like a total asshole!_

"I, I don't know sir." The kid, whose name tag reads Ben, stutters.

I throw him an agitated, furious look, yet he continues speaking and it's irritating me even more. "I'll just head back to the kitchen and grab another fresh cup for you."

I hold up my hand in mid-air and interrupt him rudely. "Fresh? Oh no, this poor excuse of what you call coffee is anything but fresh! Just bring me my check, now!"

I think this guy might piss in his pants. I had no idea I have the ability to terrify someone that much.

_Well congratulations, you do! The poor guy just served you some __tasteless coffee, it's not his fault and nothing to be so angry over!_

It's too late, my foul mood has increased times fifty and he is at the receiving end of it.

Ben remains frozen in place and I wake him up by yelling, "Hello, what are you still doing here? Do I have to retrieve the bill myself? Jesus!"

At last, he takes off and practically runs to the kitchen. I'm surprised he didn't sprint home to whine to his mom instead.

All right Masen that was harsh and completely uncalled for! God, what have I done? What is the matter with me?

I lean back in the leather seat and drop my head, exhausted and ashamed of myself. I can't believe I caused such a ridiculous scene! I'm supposed to stay out of the spotlight, not throw myself right at it! This will have the people in town talking for about a week for sure. Hell, it may even make the front page headline in the local newspaper.

_**Town Recluse Throws Fit Over Bad Coffee.**_

I chuckle darkly in my mind and reflect once again on how mean I behaved.

Suddenly I feel a pair of eyes watching me and I raise my head, then glance over at Chief Swan's table. Hold up, is Isabella...spying on me, again? She's unbelievable! Wasn't it bad enough she invaded on my privacy last night? Now she has the audacity to stare at me as if I'm some kind of an art exhibit? I match her glare, narrow my eyes and present her the iciest stare. Then I purse my lips tightly, crease my brows in anger and she shudders in her seat.

Good little girl, consider yourself warned!

Luckily for her, Chief Swan grabs her attention and her eyes are back on him. I take a long, deep breath and message my temples with my index fingers. It's been one hell of a morning already and the day has just begun!

Clunky footsteps head in my direction and I look up, facing Rhonda as she walks over to my table. The moment I notice her stressed, concerned appearance I feel like utter shit.

"Hey sugar." She greets with a caring smile.

I don't deserve a quarter of her kindness, not one bit. She then crouches so that we're meeting at eye-level and raises her brow questioningly. "What happened, is everything okay?"

I sigh and my face flushes with embarrassment. "Yes, well...no. I'm not okay. But, Rhonda I sincerely apologize for my unnecessary outburst and behavior."

Rhonda nods in understanding and touches my shoulder gently in comfort.

That poor waiter should be receiving her kindness instead of me. However, I am the grieving widower everyone in Forks feels sorry for. As if that's an excuse for my dickish actions.

Rhonda apologizes profusely for the bad coffee and explains the diner is short-handed for the day; hence the reason why she had sent Ben over to me. I assure her that her apologies aren't needed, since I was the one who over-reacted, and then I explain I've been having a rough morning.

Once more she is far too understanding of my actions.

I repeat my apology, then ask her to extend them to the young man who had tolerated my very foul attitude. The right thing to do would have been to give them to Ben face to face. But at this point I wanted to leave as soon as possible. Not only am I humiliated, I feel like I'm about to suffocate and a panic attack is close to surfacing. I haven't experienced one in quite a while and I used to have them just about every other day after Kate passed away.

I'm certainly not going to have one here in the middle of a crowded restaurant. Not when she is staring at me again with those curious brown eyes.

Isabella.

Fury invades my entire being and I'm so close to losing it. If I don't leave soon, I may just end up at Chief Swan's table to confront his daughter; demanding to know why she enjoys spying on me. Insignificant girl, that's all she is!

_Really, then why are you staring right back at her?_

I exhale sharply, silently count to five, and fight back the irritation before it takes over again. The last thing I want is to worry Rhonda any more than I already have.

Just before I exit, I give her a ridiculous amount of money to pay for my bill and for the trouble I caused. Then I ask her to give Ben a generous tip, after all the poor kid deserves it. Rhonda graciously tries to decline my offer but I insist and express my apologies one last time.

Just as I'm pushing the glass door, I notice Isabella looking at me with a contemplative expression on her face. I have to try my best to avoid that girl, she's much too curious! Not that I blame her, there's absolutely nothing interesting about this town. So of course a man, who has a reputation, would captivate her.

I cringe over the mere thought.

I need to clear my head, in other words, rid all thoughts about Isabella Swan. Perhaps a simple drive with no destination in mind will help.

**~~~~TP~~~~**

I'm driving beyond the speed limit and I couldn't care less.

It feels exhilarating and is eliminating all of my stress. Besides, the road is empty. Obviously if it weren't, I would drive with more caution. I had no ideas or plans as to where I'm heading; I just wanted to drive.

Before long, I begin recognizing where I've driven to.

As I drive past the sign which reads **Garden Lake Cemetery** I wonder if I'll actually go past the black iron gates.

I turn the car right and travel down a long gravel road, approaching closer to the cemetery's entrance. Suddenly, the sound of thunder rumbles in the air and the once powder blue sky is now a dreary gray.

My heart feels heavier as I notice the rows of headstones in the distance and I'm tempted to turn the car around; but I continue forward.

Moments later I find myself standing right in front of those black iron gates. My feet are cemented to the ground and I can't seem to take another single step. I can't seem to place my hand on the knob to open the gate.

_Can't or won't?_

Suddenly, flashbacks of Kate's funeral resurfaces in my mind and my chest tightens painfully.

I remember him approaching me and introducing himself. Saying things that sliced my heart in half and will forever haunt me.

I didn't want to believe him, or any of it. But sadly it explained why her behavior was off, and why she was so distant towards the end.

I'm still incapable of wrapping my head around how I feel. How can I still love her and mourn for her, after what she did?

I swallow thickly as light moisture floods my eyes and momentarily blinds my vision.

The scent of precipitation lingers in the air and then a few, tiny raindrops land on my head.

I shut my eyes tight, willing myself to just go inside. I stand by the entrance for God knows how long and then slowly turn myself around. With slumped shoulders and my head hanging low, I walk away and direct straight back to my vehicle.

I just...can't do it. I can't bear to see her name carved on the headstone; to be reminded that she's buried six feet under, along with our unborn child.

_Don't you mea__n __**his**__ child? Admit it, deep down you suspect that it might have been his._

No, it wasn't! It was our child, right?

A single tear slips out of my eye and my entire insides go cold, the agony numbing me from the inside out.

I can't keep continuing this way and obsessing over this. It's only a matter of time before I completely lose myself.

The terrifying thing is, I think I already have.

**~~~~TP~~~~**

Minutes later and I'm near the Forks city limits, driving at a safe speed this time_. _As much I'm against the idea, I had promised my sister I would visit the grocery store. I do need a few other items, which unfortunately I'm unable to hold off from buying.

_Such as that six pack of beer you've been craving for?_

No, no booze, just some household items and food. That's all.

I arrive at the Thriftway just in time before the rainfall makes its presence known. The instant I enter inside, I walk briskly past the check-out lanes; before a certain employee sees me.

_Dammit, why does she have to be working today? You can't give me a break just this once, can you God?_

"Hi Mr. Masen!" Her irritating, valley girl voice bellows and I wince in disgust.

Jessica Stanley.

That girl has the nerve to shamelessly hit on me every opportunity she gets. She is just as devious as Tanya is, flaunting herself constantly; trying, and failing, to act sexy.

Christ, for one thing she's only a child! Seventeen years old to be exact. So what the hell would she want with a man ten years older than her? Granted, I somewhat understand her infatuation with me. I have noticed the young guys around here and it's no wonder girls have little interest in them.

I don't remember acting so immature and moronic at their age.

"Mr. Masen?" She repeats and discreetly I glance at her while picking up a shopping basket that's over near the carts.

Jessica is leaning against the counter and flashing what she believes to be a sexy smile; batting her eyelashes flirtatiously. I didn't miss how she quickly undid the first three buttons of her work shirt, in an obvious attempt at exposing her cleavage. I roll my eyes and frown but she doesn't notice since we're a safe distance apart. I thought of pretending I didn't hear her and just stroll away. However, my damn conscience advises otherwise and reminds me to be polite.

I acknowledge her with a simple nod of my head and to my dismay she speaks again.

"Hey, wait up Mr. Masen! I want to talk to you...um, I mean, I want to ask you something."

Seriously, what on Earth does she want to ask me about?

_Who cares, j__ust start walking!_

I hurriedly saunter off and head straight for the farthest aisle away from her. A smirk creases my lips the second Jessica thinks I'm out of earshot and she mutters, "Dick."

Ah finally, maybe she finally gets it and will leave me the fuck alone!

_Oh, if only you're so lucky! _

Iscowl at my inner voices and proceed on finding the items I need. The sooner I leave this place, the better.

I'm grateful the store is nearly a ghost town this morning and I won't have to deal with people openly staring at me when I pass them by.

Just as I'm almost finished with my shopping, a voice coming from the next aisle over captures my interest. I recognize who it belongs to instantly, Tyler Crowley.

Frankly, I dislike the kid; the major reason being his false reputation as "a model student/son." When in reality that couldn't be further from the truth. Tyler is nothing but a disrespectful, arrogant punk.

I used to be his and Jessica's teacher. It seems like a lifetime ago when I once walked the halls of Forks High School. A wave of nostalgia slams me but I shove aside the memories; I don't want to revisit those times at the moment.

I figure I should mind my own business regarding Crowley and continue on my way.

But then another voice, a female, grabs my attention and I cease in place.

That voice, I know it! I listen in and curiosity plagues me instantly.

"Stop it; don't touch me!"

All right, now they have my undivided attention. It sounds like the woman is in trouble and knowing Tyler, I have an unsettling feeling about this. However, this isn't some random female.

It's her, again. Isabella Swan.

I swear, is there a reason why our paths seem to keep crossing?

I sigh in defeat, damn well knowing I'm incapable of ignoring what I overheard.

Quickly, I stroll over to the next aisle and walk towards them. What I discover is shocking and suddenly I'm seeing red.

Dammit to hell, why am I feeling this over-whelming urge to protect Isabella?

It doesn't make any sense and honestly...it's shaking me to the very core.

**~~~~TP~~~~**

**A/N: LONG ONE, lol :)**

**Hey, *waves* Uh, yes a lot has happened in this chapter, lol. Let's start with Edward's version of what happened at the diner. I don't know about you all but I love Rhonda. Bless her, I just think shes a sweety! And offered some pretty good advice. Let's just hope Edward thinks it through and maybe follows some of it, *sigh*. My heart just goes out to him but I really want him to snap out of it! And I know all of you do as well. He will, I promise, it just will take some time though. But hes slowly getting there. At least hes reaching out to his family again, so that's a positive thing. And oh poor Ben right? I felt bad for him. No reason for Edward to take his pain out on him! He didn't mean to though. At least he tipped him well and apologized to Rhonda. Oh and my gosh if looks could kill. Ouch, the way he just shot those glares at Bella! What do you think of his thoughts towards her? And the revelations regarding him and Kate about the day she died?**

**Then there's the cemetery; where more things are revealed about Kate and also her lover. Ouch, right? How horrible is it to attend your wife's and unborn child's funeral and find out that very day she had an affair? Yeah, that's just heart-breaking :( I hope now you can understand a bit more why Edward is still in such pain. Lastly, we have the grocery store, lol. I have to admit that was my favorite part of the chapter to write. I especially loved Jessica's comment as Edward walks away, "Dick." Oh yes she will be a bitch in this story, I always make my Jessica's bitches, lol. But anyway, you learned another piece about Edward in this scene, did you catch it? Yes, he was a teacher at Forks High. You will learn more about that down the road. So, what did you think of Edward's reaction to seeing Tyler with Bella? Oh yes, things are about to get very interesting, hang on tight folks!**

**I really hope you enjoyed the chap, I love writing this story so much as heavy as it is. It will get a bit lighter in the next chapter as we go back to Bella's pov and find out what shes up to. And you'll also find out the story behind what happened with her and Tyler at the store. So before I wrap this up, I wanted to answer a question I received from a few of you. Some of you are wondering why Edward is so hung up over a woman that cheated on him? Well for one thing, remember he learned about the affair after she died from the man who claimed to be her lover. So Edward is torn over whether she really did cheat or not, but deep down he believes she did. Let me just explain best I can why he still has feelings for her. In my eyes and his, you cant just cut off your feelings for someone, even if they were unfaithful. Of course he's hurt, angry, feels betrayed. Yet sometimes you cant help who you love. He loves the woman she was, not the one who was unfaithful. If that makes sense. No matter what he will always care for her, she was his first real love. But, don't let that dissuade you. Believe me, he "may" have stronger, deeper feelings for a brown eyed girl down the road, hee :) Gave you a big spoiler there!**

**All right, I blabbed enough. Thanks for still sticking with me! I'm so glad all of you are going on this journey with me. Things will pick up very soon :) Oh just another little reminder that Turning Page has been nominated twice for a Wordsmith Award. For Best Romance and Best Overall Story. I have also been nominated for Best Author, Best Lemon for my fic About That Night and Best Angst for my fic Beautifully Broken. If you haven't done so, please vote for me? Just google Wordsmith Awards and you will find the link to the site. Thank you, make sure to vote for all of your fav stories and authors! Voting ends on the 26****th**** of this month.**

**Thanks for reading and of course I always appreciate a review, pretty please? I reply to each one! The next chapter may take a bit longer. Its over half finished and I will try to wrap it up as soon as I can. Again thank you for reading, it means so much! Oh and don't forget I am on Twitter: Vampgirl792011 and also on FB, Vampgirl79 Fanfiction, its a like page. Till next time, xoxo, Leslie**


	7. Chapter 6: Unpleasant Encounters

**A/N: Hi… (gives my lovely readers an apologetic look) I'm aware that in the authors note I posted last month, I mentioned this new chapter will be posted soon. I'm sorry for the delay, again, (sigh) life was hectic last month and into this one :( Anyway, I have said all of the excuses regarding what's been going on, so no need to reiterate, haa. I apologize again though; I can't believe the last chapter I posted was in May, yikes! I will try my best to update sooner for the next one. I can't make any promises, but I will do my best. Anyhow, I want to make this short and sweet so all of you dears can get to reading! I hope you are looking forward to this chapter, I am eager to read your thoughts. Quickly, I just want to dish out the usual thanks. Thanks to those of you for still sticking around and being patient! Thanks to my new readers, for adding this story to your favs and alerts. Just love for everyone all around, all of you are awesome! Chat with you more at the end :)**

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**Disclaimer: All things Twilight are the beautiful Stephenie Meyer's. I just love playing with her characters, thank you Steph!**

**My beta is the gorgeous Serenshadow, who works extremely hard in school and I am proud of her. And I'm very grateful she is a dear friend! Thanks for all your fab beta work, for making my chapters readable, and for your endless support as always!**

**Oh and incase you have forgotten, because it's been so long since the last update, here's a recap of what happened at the end of chapter 6.**

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***** Last time on Turning Page...  
**

I figure I should mind my own business regarding Crowley and continue on my way.

But then another voice, a female, grabs my attention and I cease in place.

That voice, I know it! I listen in and curiosity plagues me instantly.

"Stop it; don't touch me!"

All right, now they have my undivided attention. It sounds like the woman is in trouble and knowing Tyler, I have an unsettling feeling about this. However, this isn't some random female.

It's her, again. Isabella Swan.

I swear, is there a reason why our paths seem to keep crossing?

I sigh in defeat, damn well knowing I'm incapable of ignoring what I overheard.

Quickly, I stroll over to the next aisle and walk towards them. What I discover is shocking and suddenly I'm seeing red.

**Okay, happy reading! Hope it was worth the delay...  
**

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**Chapter 6: Unpleasant Encounters & Reuniting with Family**

****BPOV****

Charlie was not kidding.

This truck is ancient.

However, that Jacob Black person is knowledgeable about cars; and is a damn good mechanic.

The truck runs almost good as new; keyword being "almost."

For driving from point A to point B, this rusty old hunk of metal is reliable.

However, if I want to cruise along the highway at a comfortable speed of eighty miles per hour, this is so not the ideal vehicle.

Charlie repeatedly made sure to remind me before I left the house that if the truck goes over fifty she will start to rattle.

Jesus, fuck my life!

_You know things could be much worse! Build a bridge and get over it Swan!_

I sigh, turning the truck right and drive past the Thriftway sign. I enter the parking lot and glance around for an available space. There are plenty to choose from the looks of it.

Shit, it's a ghost town around here!

Odd, most grocery stores are jammed packed on a Saturday.

_True, but this is Forks not Jacksonville, remember?_

Yes I do, don't remind me! I exhale sharply and carefully maneuver the truck into an empty space, cutting off the engine.

Well, lets get it over with; this should be interesting.

I pull the key out of the ignition, grab my purse from the passenger seat, and open the door. I slam it closed before sprinting across the parking lot as light sheets of rain attack my body.

Perfect!

When the automatic doors open, a freezing blast of cold air blows over me as I enter the store. I give the entire front a long, critical once over and shake my head, incredulous. Has this town ever heard of a makeover? Good God it is obvious this store hasn't been remodeled since the nineties, how sad!

I search for an available cart and once I find one, I place my purse inside, retrieve my list and quickly read it.

Oh, this will take a while; damn you, Charlie!

While pushing the cart, my eyes take survey; searching for the dairy department. Once I spot it, I head over and try to ignore the cheesy seventies background music that is accompanied by the irritating register beeps. I wish I had brought my Ipod; it would have made this shopping trip tolerable.

After arriving at the dairy aisle, I grab the random things that are on my list and toss them in the cart. However, to my dismay, I am unable to find the last item I need from this aisle.

Unbelievable, they don't carry organic milk here!

I search the area a few times, feeling and looking like a complete moron. Just when I'm about to give up and continue on, I feel a gentle tap behind my left shoulder. I yelp and flinch in alarm, then spin around to confront the person who frightened the shit out of me. I look up and study the tall, medium built, attractive guy who appears to be around my age.

He stares at me with wonder and amusement with his head titled sideways. His lips flash a friendly smile, though I don't miss the hint of playfulness in his dark blue eyes.

God, what a nice pair of eyes he has!

Discreetly, I check him out some more and admire his stylishly cut dark brown hair, which has too much hair gel on it for my taste.

A clearing of the throat snaps me out of my musings and I blush, realizing he caught me red-handed.

_Wow, awesome job with being discreet Bella!_

I take a step back as he closes the slight bridge between us and he chuckles under his breath.

"Is there anything I can help you find, Miss?"

I give him another once over and figure out he's an employee here. _Uh yeah, the Thriftway uniform he's wearing is a dead giveaway!_

I suck in my bottom lip between my teeth, shake my head and mutter, "Uh…no thanks. I'm good."

He laughs again and arches his brow questioningly. "Really, are you sure? Because I have watched you wander around this aisle for the past five minutes. So it appears you are looking for something."

_What a nosey smart-ass!_

He grins smugly and unabashedly eye fucks me, his blues lingering on my breasts longer than necessary. Whoa, that is a little inappropriate…though somewhat flattering too. It has been quite a long time since a guy has checked me out.

_Ah Bella, come back to Earth! A little reminder, he's behaving unprofessionally by ogling you and watching your every move._ _If that does not spell creepy stalker, then I don't know what does!_

I clear my throat and take another step back. He doesn't even notice since he's still occupied with eyeballing my boobs. Now I am feeling a little repulsed over his vulgarity.

"Um excuse me…" I glance down at the nametag attached to his shirt, which says Tyler. "Tyler. Is it part of your job description to spy on your customers?"

_Along with checking them out, as if they are a piece of meat! _

Tyler howls in a fit of laughter and then quickly stops after noticing the serious look on my face. He frowns and shakes his head rapidly. "No, of course it isn't! I was here stocking the eggs in the cooler minding my own business, when I saw you. You know what, never mind. Sorry I bothered you. Are you sure there isn't anything I can help you find?"

I sigh, feeling not only humiliated but also foolish for assuming. Of course he wasn't spying on me, he was just doing his job and happened to notice the strange girl wandering all over the place.

_Stupid Bella, you are seriously stupid! Bet he won't be asking you out on a date anytime soon!_

What, who said anything about a date? I am not interested in seeing anyone currently. Then again, he is pretty cute!

_Hello, what happened to you being freaked out over the way he eye-fucked you not even two minutes ago?_

My cheeks flame and Tyler smirks at me, his eyes shining in humor as he waits for my response. God I'm sure batting a thousand with him!

I inhale deeply, breath out slowly and run my fingers through my hair. "Well now that you mention it, yes. I was looking for…does this store carry any organic milk?"

I want to melt right into the shiny linoleum floor when he glares at me as if I have grown a third eye.

"Organic?" he repeats, eyeing me in surprise as his face holds a pensive look.

Oh Jesus, don't tell me he doesn't know what organic milk is; or that they don't have any in stock. I already feel like a moron as it is!

"Oh, that nasty…uh I mean healthy stuff. Yeah, we have it. Let me show you where it is." Tyler gestures his head to the right and strolls off, leading me over to a small display where the organic products are.

Well no wonder I couldn't find it, it's hidden in the far end of the dairy aisle! Do they even want their customers to buy some of the products? Do they purposely hide the items from shoppers?

Once I retrieve what I want, thank Tyler and head over to the next aisle, his voice halts me in place.

"Hey, wait up! Uh, can I ask you something?"

Curious, I turn around and nearly bump right into him. He takes a deliberate step towards me, smashing his chest against mine and I gaze up, noticing our faces are inches apart. I take a step back, stopping when we are at a comfortable distance and nod my head in answer.

Tyler appears nervous as he shuffles his feet awkwardly and scratches the back of his neck. "So, I was uh… wondering. You're Chief Swan's daughter, right?"

Holy hell, how does he know that? I'm aware the news of my arrival is the talk of the town, nonetheless how does he know who I am? Were there flyers posted around all over the place with my face plastered on them; or do I look like my father that much?

As if Tyler has tapped into my mind, he answers my internal questions. "I heard about you moving here this weekend, and also the Chief has been showing your picture around to everyone who will look."

He chuckles and my cheeks flush five shades of red. Oh no, Charlie didn't! Oh do I plan to confront him with this embarrassing piece of information when I return home!

"Oh come on, don't be embarrassed. So…you're Isabella, right? I think its cool your dad cares." Tyler grins reassuringly and I half smile in return then roll my eyes.

"Sure it was very cool of him to show my picture to everyone in town. By the way, it's just Bella. Call me Bella."

Tyler nods and extends his hand for me shake. Wow, the people around here are very formal and friendly, aren't they? I wrap my hand over his and shake it lightly.

"It's nice to meet you Bella. I'm Tyler, of course. Tyler Crowley. So, looks like you will be attending Forks High in the fall, huh?"

I pull my hand from his and fold my arms over my chest. "It's good to meet you too Tyler and uh…yeah, guess so."

Tyler nods excitedly, his blues gleaming as he grins from ear to ear. "Cool, so I realize we don't know each other and I'm usually not this bold but…you see there's a party tonight over at my friend Connor's. He lives in this huge two story house over by the lake." He pauses and laughs nervously.

All right, call me insane but I find his awkwardness to be adorable. _Forget that, did you catch how he is about to ask you out on a date? _Hold up, I just moved here and already I have a potential suitor! _Whoa, easy there Swan, don't get ahead of yourself now!_

"So I am wondering, actually hoping, if you will be my date to the party?"

Oh shit, well that was unexpected! I consider his offer long and hard for a full minute. On one hand, I really want to go. However, on the other, something doesn't feel right about this party.

_Oh come on, live a little! When was the last time you behaved like a teenager and had some fun?_

Sadly, the answer is far too long.

Before I gave the invitation some more thought, I blurt out, "I'm sorry Tyler but I already have plans this evening."

He raises his brow suspiciously and cocks his head to the side. Crap, he doesn't believe me! No, that is ridiculous; he doesn't know me enough yet to figure out I am a terrible liar.

"You have plans? But you just moved here, right? It's safe to assume you haven't met anyone else yet." Tyler closes the gap between us and I saunter backwards right onto a shelf.

Perfect, I just allowed him to corner me! Suddenly the gaze in his eyes makes my stomach flip and my heart pounds roughly against my ribs. It's a good thing I listened to my instincts; Tyler isn't what he seems!

_You should have walked away and continued shopping after he helped you find the milk!_

"Come on Bella, go with me. It will be fun, I promise." He licks his lips as his blues intently scope my body and I cringe in disgust.

I was just beginning to like him and had given him the benefit of the doubt. What was I thinking?

Panic rises in my chest and I uncross my arms, dropping them to my sides. "Are you always this forward with customers?"

A pleased expression etches on Tyler's face as a sly smile creases his mouth. "No, I only give extra attention to the deliciously sexy ones."

Did he just imply I'm deliciously sexy? For God sakes, is this dude for real? To think I bought into his cheesy but somewhat cute charms! How did he go from acting friendly to borderline creepy in a matter of a few minutes?

My back presses deep against the shelf behind me as Tyler places his arms above my shoulders and leans his face too close to mine. I search around the aisle in panic hoping that someone, anyone will find us and intervene.

Damn, no suck luck, I am on my own!

I shudder before him and turn my face to the left as his hot breath wafts over my skin. "I have a feeling you're not so innocent Bella Swan."

A chill races over my spine as Tyler's index finger strokes across my right cheek. I turn my head, face him, and glare at him with narrowed eyes. What is that supposed to mean?

Fucking weirdo!

I attempt to duck underneath his right arm but he roughly shoves my body against the shelf and I wince over the sharp pain. All right, I need to end this, now. I seriously don't like where things are heading.

"Okay, fun is over Tyler. Thanks for the invite but I'm not interested. So, please get off me."

Tyler snickers and shakes his head. "Fun? You haven't had fun yet. Hey, listen, I can take a break in about ten minutes. Meet me out back and I will show you a great time. We can have our own private party. I mean since you're too busy for me tonight and all."

He presses his face against the crook of my neck and nuzzles my skin. Another tremor glides over my spine and a knot of fear attacks my chest. This isn't happening, not right inside a very public place! I can't believe there is not a single person around that might be overhearing this; it just figures!

_You got this Bella; just shove him as hard as you can. Then run and go report his ass to a manager. Just do something, quick!_

"Tyler, stop! That's enough, let me go!" I place my hands on his chest and shove him as hard as I can.

He stumbles back, to my surprise, and his eyes widen in disbelief. However, the menacing look on his face makes my blood run cold.

"Oh big mistake you made little Swan." He spits through clenched teeth and crosses a single step, flushing his body with mine.

Oh shit, what do I do now? I'm such an idiot for getting myself into this mess!

"Here I am being nice by welcoming you to town and inviting you out for the evening. Yet you just had to be a bitch and turn me down, didn't you?"

Tyler has a stormy look in his eyes as he towers over me. I throw him a detached look, refusing to show any ounce of the fear I'm harboring.

I snort sarcastically. "This is your idea of being nice? Well, then I'm definitely not interested. Now let me go and maybe I won't let my Dad come anywhere near you with his shotgun!"

Tyler throws his head back and guffaws obnoxiously. What an asshole! "Please, like I'm afraid of your old man. Come on baby, lighten up."

His hand slides up my chest and his fingers rapidly undo the first button of my blouse. No way am I allowing this disgusting pig to do what I think he's trying to do!

"Stop it; don't touch me!" I yell, raising my voice on purpose to stir up some attention.

I smack his hand and attempt to shove him away but Tyler proved to be stronger than I thought. So I need to make a scene in hopes a fellow employee, hell even a customer, will overhear and try to intervene.

"Help, somebody-" I start to holler, only to have my mouth covered by Tyler's large hand. My eyes widen in alarm as his nostrils flare and an irate expression etches on his face.

I gulp and struggle in his firm grasp as he growls under his breath, "Oh, so that's how it's going to be, huh? You want to play, do you baby? All right, then why don't we," Tyler's voice trails off as a different voice speaks, catching us off guard.

"Excuse me, is there a problem here?"

Tyler's head spins around as I peek behind his shoulder, and then gasp, realizing whom the voice belongs to. My eyes almost pop out of their sockets as I stare at the very man who gave that poor server a difficult time over at the diner. Mr. Masen they call him.

What is he doing here?

_Ah I don't know genius, probably grocery shopping as one does when they go to a supermarket!_

I observe Mr. Broody intently from head to toe and feel there's something peculiarly familiar about him. It's his appearance, the black baseball hat, black sunglasses and he's sporting a full-grown beard. Dude seriously needs to shave! And what's with the whole dressing in only black deal? Very strange and mysterious this Masen person is.

I didn't have a chance to ponder this any further because Tyler's voice snaps me back to the present.

"No, there's no problem here Masen. You saw nothing. Now get out of here!" Tyler throws him a stern glare and then turns to face me again. I ignore him, my eyes only on the man who came to my rescue.

"I'm afraid I can't do that Tyler." Mr. Masen replies in a tone so deadly calm, it made me shudder.

"Look Mr. Masen, you're not my damn teacher anymore, so you don't get to tell me what to do. Mind your damn business!" He snaps through gritted teeth, throwing him a steely glare.

Surprisingly, instead of being intimidated, he appears quite amused over Tyler's attitude. Mr. Masen shakes his head, takes a step towards Crowley, and removes his sunglasses. My mouth hangs open instantly the second I gaze into the deepest pair of green eyes I've ever seen. Oh God, those eyes, I have seen them before!

A flashback reminds me of exactly when I looked into those eyes and my heart catches in my throat. It's him! The next-door neighbor, the one I saw talking to himself last night and spied on innocently. Oh, shit! Well, this is awkward, and humiliating. _Forget about that for a second, did you happen to catch what Tyler said? He mentioned Mr. Masen used to be his teacher._ Well this little tidbit of information is interesting!

I break out of my thoughts when Mr. Masen's low and threatening tone speaks. "Yes, you're right Tyler. I am no longer your teacher. However, this is my concern since I happened to overhear what was going on. I'm sure your boss would want to be aware that one of his employees is harassing the Chief of Police's daughter. I am positive Chief Swan wouldn't hesitate to throw your ass in jail if I were to inform him what I just witnessed."

Mr. Masen's eyes flit over to me as he adds, "Furthermore, I'm sure his daughter will have no problem sharing the details of what you tried to do."

I nod my head, confirming and admire his captivating greens. He may be an odd, moody asshole but lord does he have beautiful eyes! Masen switches his attention back to Tyler with a livid expression on his face and a chilling dark gleam in his eyes.

"Now, I suggest you back the hell away from her, before you regret it." Though his tone was composed, I didn't miss the underline of malice to it.

Tyler shakes his head, his face displaying a peeved look as he waves his hands defensively. "Whatever, Masen. I'm only backing off because I have to get back to work and don't want any trouble with my boss."

I refrain from laughing, because that statement couldn't be any further from the truth. If you ask me, Tyler looks scared shitless of Mr. Masen!

He then sneers at me as his eyes appraise my length one last time.

God, I'm so tempted to punch his damn lights out!

"See you around Bella," Tyler says and winks suggestively. I roll my eyes, casting him a look of utter disgust.

Finally, he turns around and strolls off, leaving Mr. Masen and I alone.

Alone.

I direct my attention to Mr. Masen and notice he's eyeing Tyler's form as he turns right, and then disappears. God, if looks can kill, then Tyler would be a dead man by now! I watch nervously as Mr. Masen clenches his jaw tightly and closes his eyes. Then exhales sharply and I consider briefly whether to ask or not if he's all right.

_Him, what about you? He should be checking to see how you are doing, not the other way around!_

My thoughts cease when his dulcet voice says. "Hey, are you all right?"

I nod slowly and gaze wearily at his face. Honestly, I don't know why he even bothered to ask, he doesn't appear the least bit concerned about my well-being. If anything, the indifferent expression on his face clearly shows that he doesn't want to be in the same room with me.

Wait a minute! Where he is going? He just rescued my ass, checked to see how I'm holding up and now he's walking away? I didn't even have the chance to thank him!

"Wait, please! I…"

He spins on his heel, looks at me agitatedly, and groans under his breath. "What?" he snaps in a clipped tone that makes me tremble.

My insides grow frigid and my stomach is feeling queasy as my heart hammers against my chest. Something about him is very off; nonetheless, it isn't enough to frighten me away. Why is that?

_Because you're an idiot, now thank the man for his assistance and leave!_

"Well, I just, I wanted to, um…" I stammer, feeling ridiculous for losing my ability to form a single sentence. _For crying aloud Bella, just spit it out!_

"You wanted to, what? Just say it; I don't have all day to stand around here. You already interrupted my time, so make it fast."

I blink at him in bewilderment, shock, and curiosity gripping my chest. As his bitter words settle in, my blood stews and I throw him an incredulous glare. Did I hear him correctly? Did he have the audacity to imply that I ruined his _precious_ shopping trip? Well, excuse me for being sexually harassed! He didn't have to come to my rescue, no one asked him to! _That's true, but be honest with yourself, you are thankful for his help._

I found the courage to speak again, though I didn't dare to gape directly at him. "I, well I want to thank you for helping me and-"

"No thanks are necessary. I wouldn't be able to deal with a guilty conscience knowing what I witnessed and didn't offer my aid." He shrugs his shoulders as his face displays a slightly arrogant expression.

Why that cocky bastard, he only helped to ease his conscience, that's it? Unbelievable!

"Is there a problem?"

I didn't answer, struggling to find my voice again as the anger within consumes me. His brows then crease and his lips purse as he stares deep in my eyes, contemplatively. "Well, if that is all…"

"No, no! I'm not finished, what is your problem?" I demand, in a voice laced with fury.

_Whoa Bella, it's not the greatest idea to test his nerves! Hope you know what you're doing!_

He casts me a deliberate gaze and the chilly flash in his eyes makes me feel about two feet tall. "What is _my problem_? I'm not the one with the problem, _you are_! Are you aware of your disturbing habit of spying on people? Do you get a _thrill_ out of it? Perhaps I should disclose to the Chief how his daughter disobeys the law by peeping into others-"

"_Excuse me? _How… are you… _kidding me_? I wasn't spying on you that night! I was… uh," I'm flustered and pissed off at myself over how stupid I'm behaving and sounding.

"Yes, you did. You were _spying._ That's when a person watches someone without their knowledge-"

"I'm aware of what it means, all right? I'm not stupid! Listen, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it…"

Dammit, why am I allowing this grumpy asshole to get underneath my skin? What did I do to make him dislike me so much?

_Uh, let's review, shall we? He caught you spying on him, and then he helped you out of a harmful situation with a creepy classmate. How do you expect him to react?_

"Look I helped you, so I've done my good deed for the day. Now if you excuse me, I would like to return to my shopping. Oh and a word of advice Isabella, stay the hell out of trouble." He advises in such an icy voice, I cringe.

Apparently, he didn't scare me enough because I grab the back of his arm, freezing him in place. He then spins around and throws me an enraged glare.

"Take your hand off me!"

"No." I murmur, swallowing hard and struggling with putting on a brave face.

He chuckles dimly, shakes his head, and takes a step, closing the gap between us. His warm breath blows against my skin as he leans in, and my heart thunders roughly as his livid eyes lock on mine.

"Now listen carefully, because I will only say this once. Stay away from me. Don't spy on me, or try to talk to me again. But most of all, don't even bother trying to be my friend. I don't want one, and never will."

Before I had the chance to process his appalling, cruel words, he stalks off and leaves me frozen in place with my mouth hanging open. A light blanket of wetness covers my eyes and I blink, willing them away.

I can't believe that just happened! I never felt so humiliated, idiotic, and slightly terrified in my entire life. What could have happened to make him so bitter, so angry, and hate the world?

Despite his warning, I'm determined to uncover more about him.

I just hope my heart won't burn in the process.

*****TP*****

I huff through clenched teeth, whirl my cart around, and head over to the next aisle. Then I stop dead in my tracks when a female's voice hollers at me and I gesture my hands up in the air. Will I ever finish this shopping trip? I just want to go home and pretend what occurred moments before never happened. However, God has other plans.

"Uh, excuse me... you're Chief Swan's daughter, Isabella, right?"

I turn to my left and spot a short girl with curly light brown hair standing in front of me with her hands on her hips. I also notice she's wearing a Thriftway employee nametag that reads Jessica. I swear, don't these people actually work, instead of parading around and harassing customers? Her mouth curves into an amused grin and her eyes are shining with excitement as she looks at me curiously.

Oh, I can tell already she is one of those town gossipers! I'm aware of her kind; I knew plenty of them back at my old school. I don't have time to deal with her.

I nod my head in reply, exasperated and say, "How did you know I'm… never mind, and it's Bella by the way."

An awkward silence follows and I grow uncomfortable as Jessica just glares at me. Then she breaks the ice. "So, I'm curious, what did you do to piss Mr. Masen off? I've never seen him so angry."

I give her the brush-off and mumble, "Nothing, I didn't do anything. Excuse me." I proceed to stroll away and she follows right beside me, like a loyal dog to its owner. Geez, for a little thing, she moves fast!

"Look, I don't know what happened, or what was said, but word of advice; stay away from Mr. Masen. He is not the person you want to get on your bad side."

"No kidding." I mutter, my voice dripping with sarcasm.

"I'm serious. Stay away from him."

I cease in place, turn my head, and glare at Jessica dead in the eye. This is stupid, why is it almost everyone in this town is afraid of this guy? It doesn't make any sense! For example, take Tyler. He doesn't seem to be the intimidated type. However, the second Masen dishes out a threat, Tyler chickens out and scurries off. Now this snooty bitch is threatening me, what gives? Does she have a thing for the elusive Mr. Masen?

"All right, I'll bite. Humor me; fill the new girl in please. What's Masen's story? Why are some people scared of him?"

Jessica chuckles and shakes her head in disbelief. "Wow, your dad didn't fill you in at all, did he? I'm surprised he hasn't considering you live next door to Masen and all."

Okay, this girl is grating on my last nerve! I am in no mood for trying to solve her cryptic words!

"Well my dad hasn't said much about him, so why don't you fill in the rest of the blanks? Since you brought it up." I raise my brow and cross my arms over my chest, hoping she will finally dish out a straight answer.

She appears thoughtful for a few seconds, then gestures her hands back and forth. "Sorry, I don't have time to explain it right now. I need to punch out for my lunch break. But, why don't you ask the Chief himself? Better yet, Google him. You will find all of the answers you are looking for on there." Jessica smirks and quickly strides away before I can stop her.

Okay, what was that all about? I swear this town is strange; I truly understand now why Mom didn't like living here!

I shake my head incredulously, and then finish the rest of the shopping. I discreetly search for Mr. Masen while navigating from aisle to aisle, but he was nowhere in sight. No matter how hard I try, I'm unable to shake the image of his face and eyes out of my thoughts.

Something about him is luring me in and I can't pull back. I don't want to. To hell with his warning, I have to see him again.

*****TP*****

****EPOV****

Jesus Christ, what the hell is the matter with me?

I acted like a complete asshole to Isabella Swan! The things I had said to her were downright cruel and uncalled for!

She was nothing less than polite to me, even offered her thanks for my assistance. And in turn, how did I react? I shut down and lashed out at her.

I mean really, the poor girl did nothing to deserve such ill treatment!

_Hello, do you need a reminder? Here's a recap, she spied on you without your knowledge at your own home, and then over at the diner. Lastly, just minutes ago she disturbed your shopping trip, thanks to her being in a sticky situation with Tyler Crowley. You just had to interfere and play hero, didn't you?_

Well, in my defense, I certainly couldn't just walk away. I had to intervene and come to her aid. She had no idea the kind of character Tyler is, a no good, vile being who has zero respect for others; especially women. It's a good thing I arrived when I did.

I admit the fear I noticed in her eyes when I found her with Tyler, rattled me. So much that I didn't even second guess my choice, just reacted. Whether it was Isabella, or any other woman, I couldn't allow Tyler to have his way with her.

Wait a second; am I seriously implying I'm relieved for coming to Isabella's rescue? Why am I even wasting my time thinking about her? I swear the girl has been a thorn on my side ever since she arrived in Forks!

I reflected to earlier when I warned her to keep her distance and chuckle bitterly. How is that even possible? She's my next-door neighbor, I'm bound to see her every once in awhile. _And remember Isabella is Chief Swan's daughter. Therefore, when he is around, I'll have no choice but to be pleasant to her._

Here's a simple solution, I'll avoid her to the best of my ability. _Good luck with that idea!_

I sigh crossly and storm over to the checkout line, ready to leave this place. Oh thank God, Jessica Stanley isn't at her register. At least I can checkout in peace; I don't want to deal with her nonsense after everything that unfolded.

While waiting in line, I subtly look around for a particular someone. I scowl agitatedly and shake my head. Have I truly lost my mind? I cannot believe I am trying to find her!

Out of my own control, images of her brown eyes and anxious face clouds my mind and I try to rid them. I think back to when she had the nerve to deny my accusation regarding her spying on me the other night. If she just had admitted her wrongdoing, than perhaps I wouldn't have lost it and accepted her apology. I could have handled that entire conversation better though, instead I allowed her to push my buttons.

I curl my hands into fists and exhale deeply, hoping it will settle my nerves. Why do I keep thinking about her, what is it about Isabella Swan?

_All right, enough Masen, you need to quit obsessing over her!_

I have to get out of here and leave it all, and her, behind.

Thankfully, I am out of Thriftway minutes later, back inside my car and driving home to put away the groceries. Then it's off to visit my parents. I'm really looking forward to seeing them. Family time sounds perfect right about now, a distraction is exactly what I need.

*****TP*****

The moment I arrive at my parent's home, a bundle of nerves weighs on my chest. As my eyes land on their modern two-story home, a wave of remorse plagues my heart.

It's been much too long since my last visit and I regret it more that words can express. However, on the bright side, I'm relieved I finally came to my senses, that I'm putting an end to my self-pity and allowing them back in my life. They certainly didn't deserve the walls I built between us.

Bottom line, I miss them, all of them. I need my family, their support and love; it will help me move forward.

Moving forward…

I take a deep, long breath and release slowly. Well, here goes. I cut off the engine, pull the key out of the ignition and open the door. After exiting and slamming the door shut, I notice familiar vehicles parked in the driveway. Huh, it seems my parents invited some guests, not just any guests, my siblings. I shake my head and run a trembling hand through my already disheveled hair.

Dammit, I didn't prepare myself for this. I haven't seen the others, besides Alice, in a few months. It will be interesting, to say the least, all of us together in the same room. How will they react to seeing me, how will things go?

_You know how they feel; they have only ever given love and compassion to you, and always will. They are your family after all. _

My family.

A nervous half-smile twists my mouth as I timidly stroll over to the front door. I sigh quietly, and then ring the doorbell. Brief moments pass, and the door flings wide open. Standing to welcome me is my beautiful mother. Immediately her slim arms circle firmly around my middle, before I have the chance to greet her hello.

I return her warm embrace, holding her gently, and she murmurs against my chest. "Edward, it's so wonderful to see you, actually see you. I've missed you, so much."

My heart sinks at the sound at her broken, wistful voice and I swallow thickly. "I missed you too, Mom."

I must admit it is truly comforting to be back at home and surrounded by the people who care about me.

*****TP*****

**A/N: (Long one!) Hello again! So, uh, what can I say? Isn't shopping at the Thriftway is quite the experience? Haa. Poor Bella! Girl couldn't catch a break in this chapter. First Tyler, what a freaking pervy jackass, (shakes head) and then Mr. Grouchy Pants Edward! (shakes head again) Ouch, right? He was beyond harsh to her. However, you guys did get a tiny peek into his mind, his point of view of how he felt about what happened. At least he realizes the way he behaved was out of line. The question is though; will his guilt over how he treated Bella be enough to make him maybe apologize to her next time they cross paths? You shall see, (wink). So what are your thoughts regarding the incident with Tyler? What do you think of Edward's reaction, him and Bella's argument?**

**And, how about that Jessica, huh? Annoying as always, right? I really look forward to reading your thoughts! I am sure many of you are peeved at Edward, which is totally understandable! However, let me assure all of you that he will eventually come around when it comes to Bella. Oh and I'm sorry for leaving a little cliffy at the end, haa. The scene with Edward visiting the family is long, so I figured that was a good place to end the chap and continue it on in the next one. I have a feeling all of you will enjoy Edward's reunion with his family. More characters will make an appearance in the next chapter also, and things will get interesting for Edward! That is all I will say, hee. Chapter 7 will also be in Bella's pov too and… well you will just have to read it and find out what happens. So I have some good news, chapter 7 is just about finished! Hopefully, (crosses fingers) it won't be several months until I post it, more like a week or so. I will try my hardest sweeties!**

**In other news, if you do not have me on author alert yet, I suggest you do so! I will be posting a new story soon, in about a week. It's a short one, will only be about three or four chapters. And, it's a femslash fic. Yes, in this story, the pairing is Bella and Alice! Here's a little info about it…**

_Title: Simply Fate_

_Pairing: Bella and Alice  
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_Genre: Romance, Drama, Friendship_

_Rating: M for language, adult themes. (Yes, it will get a bit steamy, hee)_

_Summary:_ _Bella is heartbroken and fed up with life. Alice is willing to open her heart and love again. When these two have random encounters, will they realize its fate and seize the moment? If so, what will happen the morning after?_**  
**

**What do you think? If it sounds great to you, then add me on alerts. I hope some of you will give it a shot! It's a sweet, adorable, sexy story I'm having a fun time writing it. Oh and for those of you who read my other fics, please don't worry, I am still going to update them also very soon! All right, before I finally shut it, I just wanted to give you a friendly reminder that I am on Twitter under vampgirl792011. Follow me and I will follow back, I love chatting with my readers! I am also on FB, it's a fanpage, vampgirl79 fanfiction, hit the like button and say hello!**

**Finally, FF has allowed links back, yea! So for those of you, like moi, who enjoy looking at story visuals, I have plenty for all of you to see. Check out my story visuals in my profile. There are several ones for my fics. The TP ones have links to story banners, pics of Bella, Edward, Kate, Edward's home, etc. Okay, that's it, thanks for reading and don't be shy, please leave a review! It makes me happy, I love hearing from all of you! I reply to each one also. Again, I appreciate all of the support and understanding; it means so much! See you soon, xoxo, Leslie**


	8. Chapter 7:Reconnecting & Discoveries

**AN: Peek-a-boo! Hola lovelies! Yes, I know, I know...I promised I would punch out the next update sooner than a month from the last one. My apologies ;( At least it wasn't a month exactly, or longer, haa. Anyway, the usual excuse darlings, life is hectic ;( I appreciate your support still and your patience, it means the world to me! Hope the longish wait is worth it. This is a pretty long chappie with Grouchward's...yes, I decided to give him a name, thanks to some of my lovely readers who penned him that, lol. So...where was I? Oh, yes this chapter is in Edward's pov and Bella's too. Quite a few interesting things and discoveries take place in this, I cant wait to read your thoughts on them. So, with that, let's get to reading shall we? First though, I just want to dish out my usual thank you's. Thanks for reviewing, reading, for adding this story to your alerts, and fav's! It makes me oh so happy! Chat with you more at the end :)**

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*****Disclaimer: It's not mine, you already know! But, what is, are tickets to see BD 2 opening night, eek! My dear hubby is taking me, bless him, it will be a date night. I am excited! Only less than a month guys, woohoo!**

*****My beta is Serenshadow who is the best of the best, love you bb! And also I have a new pre-reader/beta the lovely SunflowerFran3759, thank you lady for all of your hard work with this long chapter. You did a great job! xo**

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**Chapter 7: Reconnecting and Discoveries**

****EPOV****

As Esme and I embrace each other in comfortable silence, I reflect about all of the wonderful memories I had growing up here. There were plenty of laughs, happy moments, and some unpleasant ones too. However, despite it all, we made it through those times together, as a family. I can't believe I only made minimal contact with them for such an extended period, time that's impossible to replace. I certainly wasted plenty of it by feeling sorry for myself, refusing help from the people who love me, and being unwilling to move forward with my life.

Not only will I make things right with my family, but with myself as well. I allowed this to drag on long enough.

Esme gently pulls away, breaking my deep train of thought, and takes a step back. Her eyes assess my face warily, and then she creases her brow in concern.

Oh great, I should have known better than to believe she would let me off the hook that easy! No matter how old I am, Esme will forever think of me as the quiet, withdrawn boy that she graciously accepted as part of the family many years ago. Since then she's been fiercely protective and loving, just as mothers are with their children. It doesn't matter that I'm not her flesh and blood, as Alice and Emmett are.

The Cullens have always made me feel loved, important, and above all like a part of their clan.

Esme's soft voice pulls me back to the present. "So…how are you sweetie? You look…" her concerned eyes gives my face a long once over. "Like you haven't eaten in weeks. You're paler, and there are dark circles under your eyes. Are you still having trouble sleeping?"

I shake my head. "No Mom, I'm all right. Really, I'm-"

"It sure doesn't look like it from where I'm standing. I should have your father look at you. Did you eat any of the food I made for you?"

"Yes, plenty of it actually. Thanks again, it was delicious as always." I stare in her eyes and present her with a reassuring grin. "I'm doing fine, I swear. I'm getting enough rest and…"

Esme frowns and I cease mid-sentence as she studies my shaggy hair and full-grown beard in disapproval. "Hmm, Alice didn't mention this. When's the last time you had a haircut? And what's with this beard?" She reaches over and lightly grazes it with her fingers. "It's, well…you look different, older. I suppose I'll have to get used to it."

She half-smiles and sighs sadly. "Darling, are you sure you're all right? I'm aware you've had a rough couple of days and…"

"Esme dear, let our son breathe a little, will you?" A teasing voice admonishes, and our attention directs to my father, Carlisle. He strolls casually towards us with a warm smile on his face and immediately I notice relief in his blue eyes, as he appears happy to see me.

Once again, I feel incredibly guilty over what I've put my family through and how much I've hurt them.

Esme blushes, chuckles sheepishly, and then steps aside, allowing Carlisle to take her place. "I can't help it Honey, it's my job to make sure all of our children are safe and happy."

Carlisle grins affectionately at her, leans over, and plants a kiss on top of her head. "I know Love and I want the same for them as well."

He strides over and quickly embraces me. "Hello son, it's good to see you. Glad you made it."

"Likewise Carlisle, thanks." We enter inside the house and I search around the foyer as Esme shuts the door. "So… where is everyone else?"

Right away, she throws me an apologetic look and Carlisle laughs. "Well, we tried to rein Alice in..."

"As if that's even possible." Esme teases and we burst out in laughter. "The moment I informed her you would be visiting today-"

"I just had to invite myself over!" Alice finishes, skipping over to us with her husband Jasper by her side. "What's a gathering without me anyway, right?"

I snort playfully and roll my eyes. "A peaceful one for starters."

"Ha, ha, very funny little bro, I'll allow that comment to slide. Now, where's my hug?"

Before given the chance, Alice dashes over to me and throws her arms around my middle, giving me one of her bone crushing hugs.

Unbelievably, as petite as she is, she is quite strong. Don't let her dainty appearance fool you!

I groan in mock annoyance as my sister firmly clings to my body. "Ali, for the love of God, you're acting as if it has been a year since I saw you last. You just visited me yesterday!"

Alice giggles and pulls back, finally allowing me to breathe. I shake my head incredulously as she bounces excitedly on her heels. "I know, I know, but humor a gal, will you? When was the last time all of us were together in the same room, anyway?"

She casts me a deliberate, wistful glare and remorse assails my heart. She just had to throw that in my face and make me feel like shit, didn't she?

"Ali, come on darling, ease up. Edward has nothing to feel guilty about." Jasper reprimands lightly,as he strolls towards us. "Hey brother, great to see you. How are you?"

Jasper extends out his hand for me to shake, and then I reply, "I'm all right, hanging in there. Good seeing you as well, all of you."

A reminder crosses my mind and I give my sister and her spouse an appreciative look. "By the way, thank you for the DVD you created in honor of Kate's birthday. It was…perfect."

My voice slightly quivers and Alice sniffs, her eyes watering as she murmurs, "Of course. We were happy to make it and figured it was the right moment for you to watch it."

Jasper nods, agreeing, and a poignant silence permeates the space. Just when I decide to lessen the tension and inquire about my brother and his family, a recognizable booming voice hollers, "Well, well, well…look who decided to join us back in the land of the living!"

Emmett.

Shaking my head in disbelief, I smile in amusement as my brother enters the room. A wide, toothy grin creases his mouth as he reels me in for a brotherly embrace. After we part, Emmett teasingly shoves my shoulder and smiles in mischief. "You know I'm only fucking around bro, I'm really glad you're here!"

"Em, watch your language!" Esme chastises, and Emmett rolls his eyes, shrugging his massive shoulders.

He then meets my gaze and says, "In all seriousness, these family gatherings just haven't been the same without you. I mean, I only had Ali and Jazz to pick on, but they're too easy and boring as hell, too."

"Hey, we are not!" Alice gripes, pouting disapprovingly and crossing her arms over her chest.

The entire room fills with deep laughter and my brother ignores Alice, picking up where he finished last. "Anyway, you always make things more entertaining little bro."

"Missed you too Em." I reply dryly, and chuckle again as he shakes his head.

"Hello Edward." Another familiar voice greets, and all heads turn towards the voice.

Emmett's wife Rosalie gracefully enters the room, along with their two children running behind her.

"Hi Rose, it's wonderful to see you. How are you?" We share a cordial hug and the moment we pull away, my eyes widen as I take in my niece and nephew's appearance.

A hint of sorrow and remorse strikes my chest. God, has it truly been that long since I've seen them last? They are at least an inch taller and their faces have matured. Time passes by much too quickly.

My thoughts come to a halt as their voices shout animatedly, "Uncle Eddie!"

Smiling widely at them, I bend my knees, stretch out my arms, and they run right into me. Holding them tightly, I murmur, "Wow, look at you guys!"

I withdraw back and study them in awe. "I swear the two of you have grown at least an inch since I last saw you."

"I'm eight years old now!" Emma brags, proudly waving eight of her tiny fingers in front of my face.

"So am I!" Liam counters, and steps in front of his sister, gesturing his fingers as well.

Amused, I laugh and shake my head. "I know. The both of you are growing up too fast. Slow down for old Uncle Eddie here, will you?" I try to hide the sadness in my voice but fail miserably.

I feel like the biggest asshole in the world. I have missed so many things because of my egotistical decision to shut my family out. _Quit __the__ self-loathing; moving forward, remember?_

"So Uncle Edward," Emma's adorable soft voice says, snapping me to attention. "Mama told us you were sick."

Oh, well, I didn't expect to hear that come out of her mouth. However, I understand Rose and Emmett had to tell the children a reasonable excuse regarding my absence.

The twins gaze at me with a trace of sorrow in their eyes and it breaks my heart. Swallowing thickly, I answer truthfully, "Yes, I was. I wasn't feeling quite myself for a long time-"

"Well, are you feeling any better now?" Liam interrupts in an expectant tone.

"Yeah, to me you don't look so sick anymore." Emma chimes in, and Liam nods his head, agreeing with his sister. "We've missed you so much."

I have missed them very much as well. They are such wonderful kids and will always have a special place in my heart.

"I miss going to the baseball games with you Uncle Eddie." Liam says, and his face lights up excitedly over the memory. "And I miss the pizza place you would take me to after the game. They had the biggest slices of pizza with lots of gooey cheese on it; remember? Mommy and Daddy never take me there and I have begged them to!"

The entire room erupts in laughter over Liam's sweet and amusing comments. Then I seize to opportunity to tease Emmett and Rose about depriving their children out of eating the most delicious pizza in the city.

Once everyone settles down, I give the kids a reassuring look and say, "I've missed you both too, very much. By the way, to answer your question Liam, I'm feeling…better now. In fact, this is the best I've ever felt in quite a while."

A comfortable silence passes and I glance over at Emmett and Rosalie, who both throw me an apologetic look. Nodding my head, I smile, and assure them with my eyes that I understand. They're children after all, and it's perfectly natural for them to be curious and ask questions. If anything, I should be the one apologizing to my brother and his wife, for putting them in such an awkward position.

I feel beyond horrible for putting them through that, especially the twins. They are young and don't understand any of this. I realize I sound like a broken record, but I will repair the damage I've caused, no matter what.

Clearing her throat, Esme claps her hands, and then faces the kids. "Hey, why don't we check out what kind of snacks are hiding in the kitchen? Grandpa Carlisle keeps his own stash in a secret place. You want to find out where it is?"

The twins nod in anticipation and Carlisle's eyes widen as he places his pointer finger on his lips. "Shh, no sweetheart, that's _my_ secret stash!"

Everyone chuckles, except Rose as she gives Esme a disapproving glare. "Oh Mom, I don't think that's such a good idea. I really don't want the kids to spoil their lunch."

Esme laughs and waves her hand in the air dismissively. "Ah, they won't Rose, relax. It's just a snack, besides; lunch won't be ready for a while. Carlisle is just about to fire up the grill in a few moments."

She grabs Emma and Liam's hands, and then directs them out of the room. "Come on you two, into the kitchen we go!"

Carlisle then makes his departure and Rosalie, Alice, and Jasper join him shortly after, offering their assistance. I'm surprised to see Emmett staying behind, usually when snacks are mentioned; he jumps at the chance to shove them down his throat.

Instead, he saunters over to me with a remorseful expression. I already know what he's about to say, so I save him the effort by shaking my head and wave my hands back and forth.

"No apologies are necessary Em, really. I completely understand that you and Rose needed to come up with something to tell the kids."

Emmett nods and scratches the back of his neck. "Yeah, we had to think of something to tell them because they hounded us with questions about you almost every day." He laughs nervously as a pensive look crosses his face. "They're too smart for their own good you know. Children are very perceptive."

"I know…"

"Again I apologize, but Rosie and I had to explain to them why you haven't been around." Emmett breathes out sharply and murmurs in a grave voice. "They asked about Kate too, on occasion. Even though they were younger when she passed away, they still remember her and miss her."

I sigh quietly and run my hands through my hair. Foolishly, I had no idea how much the twins were affected by my absence, and from Kate's death as well; those poor kids. Now I feel like a bigger piece of shit, than I already did. Speaking of Kate, she would have been livid with me if she knew what I've put my family through; she had cherished my family dearly.

"As do I Em, listen, I'm sincerely sorry for putting you and Rose in that position and for not visiting, or calling the-"

"All right, enough of that, bro. I appreciate it, I do, but Rose and I understand. You have been through hell for over a year now and we all are just worried." Emmett's eyes glisten in pity as he gives me a concerned gaze.

"Edward, it's just you and me here. No bullshit, okay? Be straight with me. How are you holding up, really?"

There's no use in lying to my brother, he simply knows me too well.

I sigh. "I'm taking it one day at a time. Some days are worse than others. Sometimes it takes a lot of willpower just to get out of bed. Take yesterday for instance, it being Kate's birthday. Everything just…hit me, hard. The memories, the emotions…"

Emmett nods sympathetically. "I can imagine man. But…it's been almost two years since her…" He clears his throat, his expression perturbed as he continues, "Have you given any thought about-"

"What, moving on and finding someone else to spend my life with? Of course I have Em, many times, but she was…it's complicated."

I can't exactly divulge my knowledge about Kate's possible affair because I'm still unsure whether it's even true. So why should I put my family through the unnecessary disappointment about something that may have not happened?

"What's complicated about it?" Emmett pries, snapping me out of my thoughts. "You loved, well, still love her, right? She was your everything, the great love in your life, I get it. However..."

A knock on the door unexpectedly ends our conversation, and we glance at it curiously. Emmett raises his brow and flashes a mischievous smile. "Hmm, wonder who that is."

He proceeds to walk backwards with an amused look on his face. "Hey, would you mind answering that? I'm heading to the kitchen now to see what's left of the snacks."

Is it just me, or does my brother know who is on the other side of the door? What is he up to?

"Sure, no problem. It's not like I didn't want a snack anyway." I tease as my brother chuckles, spins on his heel, and strolls out of the foyer.

Thanks a lot, big brother! Taking a deep breath, I unlock the door, swing it open, and meet eyes that belong to a recognizable face.

"Edward!"

"Irina?"

She bridges the slight gap between us and then curls her arms tightly around my neck, bracing my body gently. "Oh, am I happy to see you!"

"Same here." I murmur in her ear, pulling away and staring in her eyes, the very same color that Kate's were. "It's been…"

"Far too long."

Moments of silence go by and then Irina smiles brightly as she rubs my arm affectionately. "It truly is great to see you. How are you? I've been incredibly worried about you."

A wave of regret attacks my heart again. That's right, I never returned her call from yesterday, or accepted her invitation to come over to her place, on Kate's birthday of all days. I couldn't even be a decent human for just one day and be there for my oldest and dearest friend during her time of grief. Yet, here she stands before me with a smile on her face, and expressing her concerns for me. I should be the one doing that for her! I have to rectify this, it's the least I can do.

Frowning deeply, I look at her ruefully and say, "I'm so sorry I let you down Irina. I should have accepted your invitation, not that I didn't want to come. Or at the very least I should have called-"

"It's fine Edward, apology accepted, I understand. Yesterday was a difficult day for all of us…what matters now is that you're here with your family. And, I'm seeing you after such a long time."

She is much too generous. I don't deserve her sympathies, or her forgiveness, not one bit. Nevertheless, I am utterly grateful for it.

"Thank you for understanding Irina, and for your friendship and kindness," Exhaling sharply, I shove my hands in my pockets awkwardly. "So…ah, Carlisle didn't mention that you would be dropping by."

Irina grins sheepishly. "I know, it was, um, last minute. Esme called me yesterday to check in and she mentioned they were having a family get together for lunch today. Then when she said you planned on coming over, we just had to accept the invitation. Unfortunately, Laurent couldn't make it though. He sends his regards."

I had wondered, and was about to inquire the whereabouts of her husband. It's a shame he isn't here, Laurent is a great person and always shares interesting stories about his childhood whenever we all meet up.

"Please send him mine as well."

"Will do."

Suddenly my brain registers all of what Irina just said. She mentioned "we" as in another person accompanied her here, which means…

My heart pounds roughly against my chest at the sound of a car door slamming shut. Closing my eyes, I take a long deep breath in an attempt to calm my rattled nerves. However, it didn't help; in fact, just thinking about her makes my blood boil.

_Settle down Masen, be the better person!_

I open my eyes and notice Irina staring right at me with a panicked and guilt ridden expression. Oh shit, so it is true, _she_ is actually here.

"I'm so sorry Edward. I tried to convince her otherwise, but she really wanted to be here too-"

"Well, hello Tiger." Her irritating, shrill voice greets. "Long time no see."

Glancing behind Irina's shoulder, I observe as her sister strolls up the pathway and heads over to where we're standing. I wince; disgusted, as she purposely sways her hips in a seductive manner, and grins at me flirtatiously.

Damn bitch! She knew that by her showing up, it would push my buttons and sent me straight over to the edge! Goddamn her!

Lord, why her, why today? I can't believe she would have the audacity to visit my parents' house! I rather she had shown up on _my_ doorstep instead.

Irina then steps aside and makes room for her sister, as Tanya outstretches her arms and smirks devilishly. There's no way in hell I am touching her, not ever again!

"Well, aren't you going to give me a hug? Don't look too pleased to see me." Tanya dryly remarks, her eyes shining in amusement.

"Tanya," I mutter in a tone filled with pure revulsion.

This is going to be a very lengthy and uncomfortable afternoon.

*****BPOV*****

The remainder of the day dragged. At least it felt that way since I was bored out of my damn mind. No wonder my mom went stir crazy when she lived here! There's literally nothing to do in this town. What the hell do teenagers do around here for fun? I wish someone would fill me in; I'd love to know!

Charlie's cool to be around but, sitting on the couch and pretending to watch the latest sports game with him, isn't my idea of a good time. Thank God, I have my Ipod and Kindle to keep me entertained, and sane. Anyhow, I wisely didn't tell Charlie about my adventure at the Thriftway earlier. He would go ballistic if he heard about my interaction with Mr. Masen.

If looks and words could kill, I should be six feet under by now! A flashback plays in my mind and I shudder over the unpleasant memory. The only positive thing out of that entire shitty situation was that he rescued my ass from Tyler. I don't understand why he even bothered though. Masen has a serious case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde complex I tell you. One moment he appeared genuinely concerned for my well-being, and then the next, he lashes out at me! Seriously, what gives?

First, there was the diner incident, when he threw that ridiculous fit to the poor waiter, and then our confrontation. I'm positive this man has a story behind his erratic behavior and I'm dying to find out what it is. If only Charlie would just reveal what he knows! I tried my best all afternoon to get him to share something, anything; because I swear he knows more than he's letting on. However, he didn't bite and now more than before, I am extra curious to solve this mystery!

_Sure Nancy Drew, whatever you say! _I snort at my inner voice and shake my head. All right, I have to cure my boredom and I have an idea where to start. I'm going to do exactly what Jessica suggested, Google Mr. Masen. Damn, if I only knew his first name that would be helpful!

_No, if only Charlie would just spill the beans about him then you wouldn't have to play detective! _Oh forget him, he's a stubborn old man, and a cop too. I should have known better than to believe I could get him to talk.

I sigh in frustration and finish washing the last plate from dinner. After this, I am officially through playing Cinderella for the rest of the evening. It was a hectic, eventful day with the diner and store episode, then cooking lunch and dinner. All right, to be fair, Charlie helped. Still, I'm a little concerned that in time my cooking will spoil him. Then again, I rather him eat at home than visit the diner almost every day. I don't even want to imagine all of junk he probably consumed over the years. Maybe I should teach him a few easy recipes.

_What are you now, his mother?_

No, I just want to be helpful, it's the least I can do. If only he would do the same in return! I think back to when I interrogated Charlie all afternoon about Masen and frown over the memory. My line of questioning annoyed the hell out of him and I screwed up any chance I had in finding out what Charlie knows about our strange and distant neighbor.

_Oh, what gave you that impression genius, when he demanded that you never mention Masen ever again?_

After I finish my kitchen duties, I proceed up stairs to my bedroom. Charlie is getting ready for work anyway, and I'm relieved to know I will soon have the alone time I crave shortly. It will be nice to have a break from the confines of my room, though it isn't necessary for me to be here. Charlie has repeatedly reminded me to make myself at home and do as I wish. Although I'm grateful for his generosity, it's still an adjustment living with him again, especially now that I'm older.

Once inside my room, I close the door, walk over to my desk, and sit down on the chair. I turn on my laptop, and while waiting for it to load, I leap off the chair and head towards the window.

_Oh, for __G__od sakes Bella, haven't you learned your lesson yet? Or are you that dense? You're just asking him to catch you in the act again!_

I know, I know, but, I don't fucking care! I can't help it; the man is fascinating. Carefully, I draw back the curtain just a notch and eye his window from across the way. To my dismay, his bedroom is dark and there is no sign of him in sight. Huh, guess he isn't home; or, he might be downstairs in his living room.

_You truly need a life Swan! Have you considered, for just a minute__, that __there's probably a good reason why Charlie doesn't want you snooping around the man? Did you also forget Masen's warning too?_

I sigh in aggravation and grimace at myself. No, I haven't forgotten. Nevertheless, that isn't going to stop me from investigating him. I'm far too interested at this point.

I direct my way back to my desk, sit down, and gaze anxiously at the computer screen. All right, all systems are a go. Hurriedly, I tap on the keypad twice and impatiently wait for Internet Explorer to load up. I select Google from the bookmarks menu and as the site appears, my fingers type on the search bar and hit enter. My eyes curiously survey the results, and then widen when bold lettering piques my attention.

With my heart lodged in my throat, I click on the link and nervously read a newspaper article headline. As the words settle in, my blood runs cold and I gasp in horror.

"Oh my God," I whisper, covering my mouth with my hands. Now I'm beginning to understand things more clearly. Jesus, the poor man!

As I reread the headline and shake my head in disbelief, a chill travels over my spine. Suddenly, a hard knock on the door rattles me and I jump in my seat.

"Bells?"

Oh shit, it's Charlie! He can't find out what I'm researching online, he wouldn't approve of it at all!

"I just wanted to wish you a good night before I leave for the station."

Quickly, I close my laptop, spin around in my seat, and face the door. _Play it cool, Bella!_

"Thanks, Dad. Um, you can come in if you like."

The door slightly cracks open and Charlie's head peeks in. I flash him a relaxed smile and try not to panic as he eyes me curiously.

"Hey kid, what are you doing?" He nudges his head towards my laptop and panic surfaces in my chest again.

God, I hope the look on my face doesn't give anything away!

Exhaling deeply, I placate my nerves and shrug casually. "Uh, not much, just checking my email."

Charlie nods. "That's good. Well, I shouldn't be out for too long. But, just in case, feel free to order a pay-per-view movie to watch, or something."

He opens the door wider, leans against the frame, and folds his arms over his chest.

Hmm, that's actually not a terrible idea. Watching a movie is just what I need to cure my boredom.

An uncomfortable silence lingers and I become more anxious by the second, as Charlie stares at me pensively. Finally, I have enough and break the ice.

"What is it Dad? Is…everything okay?"

The thoughtful appearance on Charlie's face diminishes as he creases his brows in confusion. "Uh, yeah, why do you ask?"

I chuckle and nervously run my fingers through my hair. "Well because you were zoned out for a moment there, you kept looking at me like…I don't know. Do I have a big zit on my face or something?"

Charlie snickers and shakes his head, amused. "No, there's no monster zit on your face. Wait, hold on…" He examines my face carefully and tilts his head to the side. "I think I see a black head right on your-"

I scowl at him and cross my arms in mock annoyance. "Very funny Charlie. Seriously though, what's wrong?"

I hope that it's not that he suspects I'm digging up information about Mr. Masen!

Charlie sighs and rubs the back of his neck as an apprehensive expression laces his face. "I was just…um, thinking about…How are you handling things, Bells? I imagine you must miss Renee, a lot."

Gazing at him in surprise, I nod my head, and then wrinkle my brows in contemplation. "I'm dealing. Of course, I miss her very much, every single day. But, I promised her I would be strong…she wouldn't like me wallowing, you know?"

Charlie nods sympathetically and then clears his throat. My heart cracks in half as I spot a trace of wetness in his eyes. "Sure, I understand. But, Bells, you're still…you're young and this is such a big loss. It's all right to grieve, to feel sad, and miss her. You don't have to be so strong, especially around me."

Whoa, I certainly didn't see this coming! Charlie giving me a heart-to-heart chat is a rare occurrence. Even so, I'm beyond appreciative of it. Not that I already didn't know, but, it's nice to be reminded that I'm cared for and he's there for me.

Smiling gratefully, I nod my head. "I know Charlie, thanks. I'm holding up, really. But…" I unfold my arms, place them on my lap, and start picking at my jean-covered knee. "I do always think about her, every, single day."

"I'm glad you are okay kiddo…" Charlie breathes out sharply and adds in a quiet voice, "You know, I think about her too."

Our eyes meet and immediately I notice a distant gaze in his. It's heartbreaking how much Charlie misses Renee. Though they were divorced for years, a part of him still loves her and always will. I can't even imagine what that feels like and what he goes through.

"I wonder if she's at peace, you know, wherever she is."

Charlie's voice pulls me back to the present and I sigh, swallowing back my tears. "I wonder the same too. But, then I remind myself that she's no longer in pain and she's happy. I like to believe she's watching over us."

Charlie nods, his face appearing forlorn as his eyes flit over to the window. "I love the way you think kid. Anyhow, sorry about the heavy talk, but I just wanted to make sure you're hanging in there. Remember you can talk to me about anything, anytime, okay?"

"I know Dad, and thanks. You being here for me, means a lot."

As grateful as I am that we had this discussion, and that Charlie didn't figure out what I was really doing, I just want him to leave. I want to get back to reading that newspaper article!

"All right, I'll leave you to it now. I need to be heading out anyway." Charlie pushes himself off the door and stands straight. "I'll try not being home too late."

Raising a brow, he gives me a anxious look. "Are you sure you'll be fine?"

I scoff and roll my eyes. Why does he still see me as this wimpy, little girl? "Yeah, Charlie, I will be. No need to worry, we established this yesterday, remember? I'm seventeen, not seven."

Charlie shakes his head, and smirks. "Yeah, I do. But, to me you will always be that little girl who constantly fell off her bike and scraped her knees."

I wince over the humiliating memory and blush deeply. "Dad, please. Don't start with the stories about me growing up."

He guffaws and I glare at him irritably, and then he waves his hands in surrender. "Sorry, fine no stories. However, in all seriousness, I just feel bad leaving you alone. It's summer and you should have fun like the other kids. You should be around people."

Smirking, I cast him a reassuring gaze and say, "Don't feel bad Dad, I'm good. Besides, I just moved here, I don't even know anyone yet to hang out with."

That isn't entirely true; I do know a couple of people, a pervy creep, and know-it-all gossiper. And I don't care to be associated with either of them. If they are, the examples of what the teens are like here in town, then I rather remain friendless.

"I'm hoping that will change for you Bell once you land a summer job. Maybe we can visit La Push tomorrow; I have the day off from work. Usually on Sundays I hang out with Billy."

I did my best to appear enthused over the suggestion, though I'm anything but. Honestly, I rather stay home. The thought of reuniting and socializing with people I haven't seen in years, isn't my idea of a fun time. On the other hand, a change of scenery might benefit me greatly. After all, I've been stuck in this house almost all weekend. If I were in Florida right now, I would be hitting the beach with my friends. I exhale sorrowfully over the thought.

"Sounds cool Dad. Well, see ya. Have a good night at work." Giving him a little wave, he takes the hint and wishes me a good night as well.

The second Charlie departs my room; I listen to the sounds of his footsteps as he makes his way down the stairs. As soon as I hear the front door click shut, I breathe a huge sigh of relief. God, I thought he would never leave! Now, where was I?

My heart hammers fiercely against my chest as I turn around and face my desk. With trembling hands, I open my laptop and read the screen. As the bold lettered words sink in, my stomach churns, and I shake my head in disbelief.

"Wife of Forks High teacher found dead." I murmur. Releasing a sharp intake of breath, I continue reading aloud. "The body of Kate Denali Masen, also from Forks, was discovered early Thursday evening just a few miles outside of First Beach. Authorities suspect that sleek roads from severe weather conditions were the cause of the twenty-six year old losing control of her vehicle. Evidence shows that Mrs. Masen veered off the road, crashing her car into a guardrail, then flipping over an embankment. Authorities say she died on impact. Kate Masen was the wife of Forks High English Teacher Edward Masen and daughter of…"

Forlorn, I shake my head, and then pause to catch my breath over this shocking and very tragic revelation.

Edward.

Mr. Masen's first name is Edward.

"Edward," I whisper, loving how his name sounds as it slips off my tongue.

_What's the matter with you? You just read an article about his wife's awful accident and you become slightly turned on from saying his name?_

Shaking my head, incredulously, I think about my interaction with Masen at Thriftway earlier. Everything makes perfect sense now! It certainly explains the reason behind Mr., I mean, Edward's, bitter and rude behavior. His wife died at such a young age, and so horribly. It's heartbreaking, and I can't even wrap my head around all of the suffering and loss Edward went through, correction, continues to go through.

What was she doing out driving in such severe weather in the first place? Perhaps she was coming home from work, or from running some errands.

I can't imagine what this does to a person. The emotions Edward goes through day after day, as he mourns his wife. At least with Renee, we all knew it was coming. She warned us about the short time she had left in this life. I was prepared, where as he didn't see it coming. The morning of, he probably woke up blissful with his wife by his side and they were oblivious to the tragedy that would occur several hours later. It's such a shame and incredibly sad.

Moving on, I browse through a couple more articles that featured Kate's death and even read her obituary. I felt ill afterwards and infuriated at myself for prying on something that's private, and clearly none of my business. What was I thinking?

I need a cigarette, now. I was craving for one all damn day and after reading everything I did, the urge escalated. Thank God, the rain stopped and I can open the window to take a few puffs. As I push the window up, a cool breeze caresses my skin and I breathe in the earthy scent. Since the weather is cooperating for the moment, I decide to have my smoke out on the front porch instead.

Stretching my body out on the bench, I have my first puff and breathe in the aroma of fresh air, mixed with tobacco. Ah, so soothing, this is just what I need. Closing my eyes, I allow myself to relax and take another drag. Perfect.

A loud and piercing whistle throws me off guard and I jump, rattled over the unexpected sound.

_What in the…_

"Hey, just what do you think you're doing?" A male voice hollers. Turning my head to the right, I lock my eyes with…

**Edward Masen**

*****TP***  
**

**AN: *Holds up a shield in case some of you throw things in my direction, haa* Yes, the dreaded cliffy, two of them to be exact! How dare I? I am awful, I know, ;) I promise it will be worth it in the next chapter. Many of you are dying for Bella and Edward to have another encounter, and they will trust me! Things from here will finally move forward, and get a lot more interesting. I realize it has been a slow burn, and by slow I mean this story so far has only taken place in the course of two days, slow! I can tell you that things will move on in another couple of chapters. Hang on :) So many things are about to happen! So, I am dying to know, what did you think of the Cullens? Their interaction with Edward? Isn't Esme the sweetest? She's such a loving, sweet woman! Oh and btw, in case some of you are wondering, things will be explained regarding what happened to Edward's biological parents and why Edward was adopted by the Cullens in a future chap. I wont say more than that, but all will be revealed!**

**What did you think of Liam and Emma? They will also be in the story more in another chap or so. I don't want to give too much away, but I will hint they may spend the evening with Uncle Eddie at a carnival. Perhaps he may run into a certain brunette? Oh, I gave a lot away! Oh well ;) I personally loved Edward's reunion with his family, though at times it was a bit awkward, however understandable given everything. I enjoyed Em's heart to heart chat with him too. What a great brother! Lastly, what did you think of Irina, and especially Tanya making an appearance! Oh yes, things will get a little ugly soon here. This isn't the last of her, *evil laugh* So, moving on to Bella. I always enjoy her interactions with Charlie. I thought their heart-to heart chat was very sweet and also a bit sad too. I feel for both of them dealing with the loss of Renee. Yes, that will still be further explained in a future chapter too! So, what did you think about Bella's snooping and the discovery she made? Yeah, very tragic how Kate died huh? More will be revealed about that as well soon too, meaning Kate, her death, etc. And finally, what did did you think about Edward yelling at Bella, while she was having a smoke? Any theories as to what bit his ass again? Haa. You will find out soon.**

**Okay, I rambled enough! I hope you enjoyed the chapter and I really would love to know what you think, please? I admit I am going through a funk with writing again lately, feeling insecure about it all :( So hearing from you would make me smile and push me to keep going :) Now, as far when the next update will be, I don't want to say for sure right now. I started some of it, I am hoping to have it finished in another week or two. I dont want to make you guys wait too long. But, be patient with me. Lately, I haven't had much writing time as I want ;( All right, now a friendly reminder that I am on Twitter: Vampgirl792011 and also on FB, Vampgirl79 Fanfiction fanpage. Or, I have a group now too called Vampgirl79 Fanfiction. Feel free to request to join and I'll add you! Love to have you be a part of the group :) Till, next time sweets, don't forget to drop Grouchward a line, haa. xoxo, Leslie**


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